Tag Archives: parents

Looking After Ageing Parents: Day Care VS Companionship

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Looking After Ageing Parents: Day Care VS Companionship

If you’re in the position where you are having to face the daunting reality of looking after your ageing parents, it’s understandable that you might feel like you have the weight of the whole world on your shoulders; not only do you have to manage your own work/life balance, in addition to taking care of your family, you now face increasing pressure to take care of your parent or parents.

Indeed, taking care of elderly parents can be a real struggle; Not only must you find a solution that tends to their medical, physiological, and practical needs but also their social and emotional needs, as well. One would imagine, at this juncture, that all you want to do is take care of your loved ones in their old age, but there’s a limit to how you can protect them from the inevitable pitfalls of ageing. You’ve weighed up the pros and cons of trying to care for them yourself. You’ve been through a thousand Care.com reviews to check if they’d be a good fit for some in-home care. You’re trying to explore every single option you can find to make sure your parents have the support they need. But it can be a losing game. No matter how hard you try, you’re unlikely to be able to take care of the full gamut of your parents needs – but there is an area, that is often overlooked that you can play a vital role in.

This area is that of tending to their emotional and social needs. One of the core problems elderly people face is loneliness – this sense of loneliness can be much more debilitating than any of their physical ailments and it’s totally avoidable. Again, you’re unlikely to be in the position to be a full-time companion, and it’s important that you don’t give yourself a hard time for this… as there are ways of caring for their social needs without you needing to be at their beckon call. This article explores three options that you have available to lighten the load:

Paid Companionship:

It might feel like a strange notion to have to pay someone to offer companionship, but given the level of patience and the complexity of your own emotional experience in looking after an elderly patient; an external companion can provide great relief for both you and your parent. You should check out services like the senior companion program that use senior companions to provide genuine companionship from a place of authentic like-mindedness, people who are truly able to relate with their companion as a peer; rather than a disinterested person intending to make ‘easy’ income.

The important thing when searching for a companion, therefore, is a genuine connection that leads to natural rapport. There are plenty of elderly people that wouldn’t fancy the idea of having a companion, in this way, out of pride or perhaps fear that they don’t want the awkwardness of having to interact with someone they don’t really know or trust; therefore it’s of critical importance you find someone that can relate on their level – and the natural choice would be a similarly aged peer.

Daycare:

There are many daycare options available, where people get to interact with their peers, however something to be mindful of is that just because someone is elderly doesn’t mean that they want to be put on a coach and force fed bingo sessions. It’s important you find a daycare center that is aligned with your parent(s) interests and natural character.

Assisted Living:

Should your loved one need more care than regular pop ins from you or a daycare, you might want to consider assisted living. These spaces are often specific for people who need memory care or have difficulty completing daily household tasks safely. To ensure your parent is receiving the best quality senior care, schedule tours at several different locations. Pay close attention to how the staff behaves and if the residents seem happy and as healthy as they can be. Do be sure to try and visit as frequently as you can to verify that your parents’ needs are being tended to in a loving and timely manner.

In summary, you really want to find something suitable for your parents that naturally aligns with their character. Most people value developing a deep and meaningful friendship with a person rather than several superficial acquaintances; but both options lend themselves to this. The most important thing to remember is that it’s your parent who should be deciding how they spend their time and one of the greatest gifts you can offer is your patience, understanding, and flexibility in meeting their needs rather than your own.

Featured Image By: Pixabay

Mission: Impossible (Friend To Buy A Gift For!)

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Mission: Impossible (Friend To Buy A Gift For!)

We all have that one person, whether it’s your best friend, a sibling, or significant other, there’s always someone who is just excruciatingly difficult to buy gifts for. With Christmas just around the corner, now comes a return of those anxieties, you want to be a good and thoughtful friend/family member/partner, but you have no idea where to begin. So what is the best way to buy a gift for someone who is impossible to buy for? Let’s try and think outside the (gift) box:

A Gift Card Or A Certificate:

This doesn’t exactly scream “well thought out”, but it’s a worthy compromise if you need to buy something for someone who has either got everything or they just haven’t given any hints. A gift card can seem like a cheap gift, especially since you have to tell them how much is on the card! In this respect, maybe you want to give them a gift card that is in conjunction with a few other gifts, such as a dinner out, movie tickets, or maybe a donation to charity, all wrapped up in a bright envelope.

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Who doesn’t love a gift card?!

Buy An Experience:

If you struggle to buy someone a physical gift, why don’t you buy them something that is going to stick in their mind for years to come? An experience is so much more than the typical presents that we buy for everyone. Maybe you want to plan a fun day trip or there’s a concert coming up by one of their favorite bands. At least with an experience, it shows that you put a lot of thought into what they like. And even if you haven’t had the opportunity to put much thought into it, the experience alone is so different from what they normally get as a present, that they will be totally psyched.

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 I want that trip!

Go For The Practical Option:

While this may not be the most earth-shattering of gifts, if you’ve noticed that their curling tongs have broken recently or their coffee machine is on the fritz, then you can buy them a new and improved model. It’s always difficult with these types of items to pick the best one, but there are sites that you can look at to get some reviews, such as top9rated.com, to get some opinions of the best items on the market. With a practical gift, it shows that you pay attention to them and have made a valiant effort to make life a bit easier for them.

Practical gifts also don’t need to be boring as there are so many different customizable options. You could have a T-shirt made with a picture of your giftee’s favorite band. How about a travel bag with their initials embroidered? If your giftee is your favorite person to go on a coffee date with, they will love this “I wish you lived next door” mug. Whatever you choose, the person receiving the gift will think about you every time they use it!

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 Pixabay Image

A Subscription Service:

We usually think of a gift as a one-off, but with a subscription service, you can pay for something that they will enjoy the whole year round. Something like netflix.com will always be handy if they travel around a lot and end up getting bored easily. Or maybe they are work out addicts, so you could pay their subscription to the gym for a year. It’s always a nice thing to buy a gift that is part of their lifestyle so that they can think of you every time they use it!

Buying gifts for a loved one should be fun, not stressful. Take some time to sit down, have a think, and figure out the perfect gifts for your BFF/SO/siblings this holiday season.

Protecting Your Nearest And Dearest From The Pitfalls Of Ageing

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Protecting Your Nearest And Dearest From The Pitfalls Of Ageing

When we were young and vulnerable, our adult loved ones cared for us, fed us, and clothed us, and it is the way of life that we look after them as they proceed through the aging process. However, caring for an ageing relative can be something riddled with pitfalls and difficulties. To find out more about these and how to avoid them, read on:

Declining Health: Declining health is the most obvious pitfall that you want to protect your ageing loved ones from. So what can you actually do to help them stay in tip-top condition in their twilight years? It’s going to take a partnership between the both of you for the best results.

First, you will need them to take as much responsibility for their health as possible by eating well, exercising sensibly, and keeping up with medical appointments. You can help by being there to support and educate, if necessary, when they need it.

Something else that you can do to have a more direct role in helping is to look at websites like medicalert.systems with them. This is where you can get some information on medical alarms. These can really assist in keeping your loved ones safe if they have a medical emergency and you are not able to be there immediately to help.

Declining Mental State: Unfortunately, it’s not just physical health that can decline during your nearest and dearest’s twilight years. It’s also their mental health. This can be in terms of things like Alzheimer’s and dementia, which you can find out more about at webmd.com. As well as more general mental health conditions such as depression and anxiety, which are sometimes brought on by isolated living conditions and going through the aging process.

Remember, as their physical health declines and people around them are passing away or moving into sheltered accommodation it can be very easy for your older relatives to become more isolated in their own home.  Seeing fewer people as time goes on can make it more likely that they will struggle with mental health issues as discussed at onlinelibrary.wiley.

To help in this situation, you can provide a regular schedule of contact for your ageing relatives, so they know that they will get to go out and see people that are important to them at least once a week. You can also encourage them to get involved in community programs, which will help to minimize isolation and allow them to make new friends.

Dementia isn’t quite such as easy of an issue to deal with, though. The best course of action here is to seek medical assessment and get some specialist help as soon as possible. As a residential setting may be the safest option.

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Those Seeking To Take Advantage: Sadly, there are those in the world that seek to take advantage of the frailties of your loved ones as they age. This means that protecting them is a vital part of helping them to work through the pitfalls of ageing.

Help them keep up to date with the latest scam techniques, such as the ones mentioned on itv.com, both in the real world and online. Do be sure to do it in a sensible way that doesn’t scare them and feed into the isolation that is mentioned above. Offer too, to be around whenever they have consultations for work on the home done or a sale’s pitch so that you can help protect them against unscrupulous salespeople or con artists.

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Pixabay Image

Aging can be a sad and difficult process, but the above tips can help ease some of those hardships to make it all around more enjoyable for you and your loved one.

Featured Image By: Pixabay

#blessed

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#blessed

Hi everyone and happy Thursday! This post is about to be TMI so if reading about female hygiene problems grosses you out, then feel free to tune in with a new addition of If The Shoe Fits tomorrow! I won’t be offended, I promise.

Okay, so the other night I was so excited because I had on my brand new Calvin Klein sleep pants. If you forget what they look like, here they are:

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They’re cute, right? Really, really white, right? The type of pants that you wouldn’t want Aunt Flo visiting you in, right? Well, of course, that’s what happened. The sequence of events went like this:

  1. I changed into my pajama pants.
  2. I made it a point to announce to everyone in my home how happy I was about said pajama pants.
  3. Promptly did a little twirl to show off.
  4. Sat down to watch TV after realizing that no one cared.
  5. BOOM. Started my period. -___-

After realizing that a really unfortunate “accident” happened on my brand new white jammies, I didn’t know what to do. My mom wasn’t home, so I couldn’t tell her and hear her sage advice. And my dad gets upset whenever I ask him to shave the back of my neck compliments of my short hair, so I knew he wouldn’t be of any help. But, boy was I wrong.

The thing about my dad, is that he HATES 1) Talking about bodily functions and 2) When I use the washing machine. The few times that I’ve tried to do laundry, I royally messed it up and after those unfortunate incidents, my dad doesn’t want me anywhere near an expensive piece of technology. With this knowledge, can you imagine approaching my father with a period related laundry problem? Yeah, yikes.

So, instead of using the washing machine without asking, I casually changed my pants, applied stain remover to the problem area, and asked my dad, “Do you know how to get stains out of white clothes?”. Of course, my dad had to ask, “Well, what kind of stain is it?”. I literally didn’t know what to say. Honestly, I think I would have preferred to tell him that I peed my pants. ANYTHING but my period. I shuffled my feet for at least five seconds and finally said, “It’s blood, if you really have to know”.

And what did my dad do? If you’re thinking that his head exploded from the sheer shock that his adult daughter was menstruating, then you’ll be surprised to know that he calmly replied with, “Okay, did you put stain remover on it?”. He then proceeded to ask me what material the pants were made out of and then GOOGLED “how to remove blood stains from cotton clothes”. Like, what?

My dad then walked me through, step by step, how to use the washing machine and how to remove the stain according to Google. How to presoak the pants, that I should put more stain remover on after the soak, which setting I should wash it on next, how to dry it without the pants shrinking. Every step in the dance of removing a period stain from white pants, my dad covered in detail.

And guess what? It worked! Thanks to my dad helping me and keeping a level head, the stain out of my WHITE pajama bottoms was gone. I was shocked, but after it happened, I don’t know why I thought that he would have reacted any differently. I think my dad saw that I really just needed help and taken care of. I’ve had a rough few weeks and instead of telling me to figure my woman problems out myself, he taught me how to handle it.

My dad faced his fears of 1) Me being within a foot of the washing machine and 2) Me talking about my body problems because he saw his daughter in distress. I don’t know, this just really showed me the man that my dad is so clearly and it was special to me. I put him in an awkward situation and he handled it in the way that I so desperately needed. I love my parents so much, but I’m genuinely happy that my mom wasn’t home so that my dad and I could tackle this #periodproblem together.

I feel so #blessed about my Aunt Flo scenario, but I think I’ll be waiting until after my period is done to wear my new sleep pants again! Has anyone ever had an awkward moment with their parents that brought you closer together? How do you beat the period blues? I want to hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

New Earrings Surprise

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New Earrings Surprise

Hi everyone and happy Hump Day! I hope that all of you are having a fabulous week so far. So this past weekend my mom surprised me and my sister with new matching earrings and they are SO pretty. She got my new little beauties from Target and I was pleasantly surprised because they are pretty hit or miss with their jewelry selection, in my most humble opinion. My mom hit the nail on the head with these dangling darlings so take a look and let’s discuss:

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^^^ Love.

It’s nice to know that my mom didn’t break the bank with these eight buck beauties for me and my sister. But, it’s even nicer to know that she saw these and thought of us enough to actually buy them. Little gifts and surprises like my new earrings make me so happy because everyone likes to be thought of every once in a while. To come home to my mom saying that she bought something special just for me automatically gave me the warm fuzzies. And I’m even warmer AND fuzzier considering that I’m beyond obsessed with my terrestrial themed earrings! :*)

I LOVE YOU, MOM!!!!!!!! ❤

So there you have it, my New Earrings Surprise compliments of my darling mama! What is your favorite gift that someone has given you? How do you like to surprise your loved ones? I want to hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

EducHate – Why Does Your Kid Hate School (& How Can You Fix It)?

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EducHate – Why Does Your Kid Hate School (& How Can You Fix It)?

Most children will fool their parents into thinking that they’re ill at one point or another. Moreover, most kids will probably experience the fear of going to a certain lesson after forgetting to do their homework. These things are natural. What isn’t right, however, is when a child wakes up dreading to go to school on a daily basis. If this situation has crept into your household, you must find a quick solution.

The root of those problems could come from one of many sources. Pinpointing the reasons behind your child’s fear will soon give you a far better chance of rectifying the problem. Here are some of the most common troubles, along with a suitable solution:

Struggling With The Work: School isn’t supposed to be a walk in the park, and it’s good that your child needs to work for positive results. However, if they’re falling behind, it can leave them fearing the worst. Not only will it stop them from getting good grades, but they could fear it’ll upset you, too. Being supportive is key.

Different children learn through different methods. While some learn by listening, others need a more active approach. Alternatively, your child might retain information that they’ve read. Appreciating those methods is vital. Meanwhile, write my essay for me services can help your child transform their knowledge to paper in a more technical manner. In many cases, just taking one step to accommodating their learning style can make all of the difference.

Struggling To Make Friends: Education isn’t all about academic progress in the classroom. Human interaction and the development of key communication skills are equally important. Unfortunately, some kids struggle to ever master this aspect of their school life. Worse still, the effects can be quite catastrophic.

At the worst end of the scale, your child may be getting bullied. Knowing how to help your son or daughter through this difficult period is essential knowledge for all parents, especially since no kid is immune to it. Most situations can be solved, but you shouldn’t rule out the possibility of changing classes or schools if that’s something that the child wants. A positive learning environment is something that everyone deserves.

In many cases, though, it’s simply a lack of confidence that has disrupted a child’s ability to make friends. Help them find a hobby that enables them to gain friends outside of the classroom, and the results should influence their school life, too.

Struggling With The Long Days: For youngsters, the school day can be tiring. However, it shouldn’t be so knackering that they cannot function properly. If this has become an issue, a few lifestyle upgrades should get your child back on track.

The importance of sleeping patterns cannot be emphasized enough. Encourage your child to get a better quality of rest, which will ensure that they wake up with far greater energy levels. Meanwhile, improved nutrition and hydration can also work wonders. As they say, a healthy body breeds a healthy mind.

Every child can agree that school isn’t their favorite sometimes but helping to make their school days easier can make a huge difference in their experience.

Featured Image By: Pixabay

Bully-Proof: What to Do If Your Child is Being Picked On

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Bully-Proof: What to Do If Your Child is Being Picked On

When you first have kids, you like to think that you will always be there to protect them from any negative situations that may arise. But when they start school, that is a big part of the day where you can’t be there to supervise them.

Some school issues are minor and can be dealt with in a single conversation while others are more serious and may require an education lawyer. Bullying is certainly one of the trickiest problems to handle, but it is something that a lot of kids go through at one time or another (I did!). Here are a few steps to take if your child is going through a bullying problem:

Listen to Your Child: The first thing to do is to listen to your child about what has been going on. Sometimes, they won’t come to you directly, but you should look out for any signs of emotional distress, like becoming particularly quiet and withdrawn. When you are listening to them, try to avoid becoming too emotional, but instead you should try to calmly reassure them that this is not their fault. Of course, some action needs to be taken but you need to think about the right thing to do before rushing in headfirst.

Things to Avoid: The reaction that most kids dread is that you go immediately to speak to the head teacher or the bully’s parents. And you should also avoid telling them to hit or call names back as this can cause the problem to quickly escalate. And definitely avoid dismissing the experience as just something they have to go through when they are growing up. School should be a safe haven for kids, not somewhere that they dread going because of being bullied.

Helping Your Kids Deal with the Issue: Many bullies are looking to draw a reaction out of the kids they pick on, so try to encourage your child to appear confident even if they don’t feel it. If your child gives the impression that they aren’t bothered by what is being said, the bullies are more likely to get tired of it and move on. Encouraging your kids to join some social or sporting activities can help to boost their confidence when they are at school.

Getting Support From the School: If the issue continues, it may be time to get support from the school. The anti-bullying policy varies from place to place, so you should look up what your child’s school is before taking action. You should always make an appointment with the teacher you want to see rather than turning up unexpectedly. Find out how they think is best to proceed and make sure to follow this up to see how successful they have been.

Dealing With Your Own Feelings: You will probably have a whole range of emotions going through your system, so you should try talking with people who are close to you and get advice from a range of different sources. If you know parents whose kids have also gone through this issue, they may be a good place to start.

A child’s education is so important and a bully standing in the way of that is something that should never be tolerated!

Featured Image By: Pexels

Happy Mother’s Day!!

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Happy Mother’s Day!!

Hello everyone and a Happy Happy Mother’s Day to all of the lovely people celebrating today. I’ll keep this post short and sweet so that you can get on with your brunches, walks in the park, and other Mother’s Day activities. But I just wanted to give a big lifewithlilred thank you to all of the mamas out there. Whether you’re a mom to children, your pets, a foster parent, or are in the process of trying to conceive or adopt – this day is all for you! Thank you for all that you do and for giving the world a dose of the love and care that only a mother can provide! Much love. -Sarah

A Parents And Teacher’s Guide To Teenage Depression

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A Parents And Teacher’s Guide To Teenage Depression

As a parent or teacher, we know that it is normal for teenagers to be moody and sullen. However, it is important to understand when this becomes something more serious. It is a sad fact that the suicide rate in young people is growing, so as a concerned adult you need to recognize the symptoms of depression and understand the pressures your children might be facing.

It may be that you already work in the field of mental health, are considering a career in doing so, or taking one of the masters in clinical mental health counseling programs. Parents, teachers, and counselors are on the front line when it comes to caring for children, and it is vitally important that you know how to help when they are suffering inside. Depression sucks, and here’s a few of the reasons of what might be causing it in your children, students, or friends:

Causes of Depression: Medically speaking, there is still no real evidence as to what causes depression. Genetics may play a part, as is a chemical imbalance in the brain. For the teenager, there are certain factors that can contribute. These include:

Self-Image: Every day, children are bombarded with messages from the media, peers, and social networking on how they should look, feel, and conform. Many young people suffer from body issues when they unrealistically compare themselves to the airbrushed models in magazines and online. If they are not the right weight or don’t have the right clothing, this can be a great source of stress for the teenager, especially when they face bullying because of it.

School: We all know how hard school can be (as if we needed reminding!). It is supposed to be a place of learning and growth, however, for some young people, the only knowledge they are getting is that they are not good enough. Fitting in with peers, broken relationships, dealing with too much homework, studying for tests and exams, and preparing for colleges can add a huge amount of stress into your child’s life.

Bullying is a major issue that can affect children physically and mentally. With the rise of social media, so much bullying is done online, with vile private messages and the posting of personal pictures, which the child has no control over. This can give off the illusion of nowhere being safe for the child.

What can you do? For starters, be there to offer support. They may not tell you how they are feeling, but encourage them to talk when appropriate. Symptoms of depression include moodiness, withdrawal from family and friends, lack of passion in things that they normally enjoyed doing, and mood swings. Some of these are normal for a teenager as their bodies change, but they could also be warning signs.

When you talk to your child or student, be open and listen to what they have to say. Do not judge or say something glib, such as ‘snap out of it’ (smh!!). Share your concerns with a doctor and other mental health professionals to ensure that the child receives the help that they need to get them back on track and smiling again.

Featured Image By: Vimeo

Happy Birthday, Mom!!

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Happy Birthday, Mom!!

Hi everyone and happy Hump Day! Today is a special day because it’s my mommy’s birthday!! As I’m sure that you guys have gathered by now, my mom is basically my best friend. We love to hang out together, cook, watch movies, go shopping, pet dogs, and play Scrabble. My mom is easily one of my favorite human beings on the planet and everyone who has the honor of knowing her feels similarly. It’s hard not to!

I am so thankful for having a mom who is as funny, smart, wonderful, and perfect as mine. Not to mention how caring, supportive, and encouraging she is. I can always count on good ol’ JANE to be there when I need to talk and am appreciative to have a mother who is a fantastic listener. No matter how my mom and I spend our time together, I always enjoy it because I am seriously in the best of company when I’m with her. I love you so much, mommy!

Happy Birthday!! ❤

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