Tag Archives: humor

Lil Red’s Presidential Medal Of Freedom: Too Faced Melted Matte In Queen B Edition

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Lil Red’s Presidential Medal Of Freedom: Too Faced Melted Matte In Queen B Edition

Helloooo! Have any of you ever had a beauty product that you were pretty excited about but just never bothered using? Lol, because that’s what definitely happened with the Sephora freebie I got of Too Faced’s Melted Matte lip paint. I got the shade in Queen B FO FREE with a twenty-five dollar online purchase and I thought that the deep mauve shade was pretty but it also is a color that I wouldn’t normally wear so it just sat unused in my makeup box until May 15th, 2019.

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On that fateful day, I was wearing a turquoise spaghetti strap top, denim shorts, black mini platforms, and a jean jacket. I thought that the above shade would look so good with the various blue hues that I had in my OOTD so I put some on, threw the tube of lippie in my bag, and headed out the door.

I was right, of course, because the lipstick looked divine. And, like anyone, I was expecting to have to reapply after working, eating lunch, and kissing my boyfriend. But… I didn’t? I was blown away! This lip paint literally didn’t budge. So, I continued on with my day which included eating Indian food and more kissing my boyfriend. AND IT STILL STAYED ON! It looked like I had just applied it and, at that point, I had had the color on for at least ten hours.

HOW DOES THAT EVEN HAPPEN?!
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE?!
WHY HAS IT TAKEN ME ALMOST A YEAR TO USE THIS LIPPIE?!
TUNE IN NEXT WEEK ON I HAVE NO IDEA!

But, seriously though. How is that even possible? This is why I have to award the Too Faced Melted Matte lip paint with the Lil Red Presidential Medal Of Freedom. For withstanding Indian food, PDA, and a day on the job without so much as budging. I thank you for your commendable service and cannot recommend this product enough! 😀

What is your favorite product by Too Faced? Do you have any products that have been sitting unused in your stash? I want to hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

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WILSON!!!!!

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WILSON!!!!!

Hellooo everyone! Literal years ago, my sister and I visited Chicago together for a weekend trip. We ended up at a TJMaxx there with one of her friends and I ended up with a replica Wilson volleyball from the movie, Cast Away. Wilson has been a staple in my space ever since and has his own special spot on my bookshelf:

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^^^ Can you find him?!

While moving into my apartment, one of the movers from the company I hired noticed Mr. Wilson sitting in one of my boxes and asked me if I used to play volleyball. When I laughed and said no and asked him if he’s ever seen Cast Away he looked at me like I was a crazy person so I had to drop some knowledge on him. Can you believe that there are people who have never seen let alone heard of that masterpiece?! Smh.

I am still on a big movie kick at chez moi because no cable and no streaming services so imagine how happy I was to spot Cast Away at Target for FOUR DOLLARS. You’re not going to not buy it!

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^^^ Lol, I just can’t.

I’m pretty stoked about my latest purchase and I know that Wilson is ecstatic to be reunited with his rightful owner. An afternoon viewing of Cast Away with a glass of wine in hand is just what the doctor ordered on my next day off! 😀

What is a movie that you love that no one knows about? What is your favorite cult film? I want to hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

Who Wears Short Shorts?

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Who Wears Short Shorts?

Hi! One trend that I could never and will never get into is all high waisted everything. Don’t get me wrong, it looks super cute on some people, but me? Not so much. As a petite girl at 5’1, high waisted clothing makes me look really short and makes my ass look REALLY flat. Which is so not okay because, I hate to brag, but over a decade of figure skating has blessed me with a behind that is definitely above average. In conclusion, high waisted and I just don’t get along.

When this trend became popular five or so years ago, it has become increasingly difficult to find shorts that are a normal rise. It seems like every store that I go to only has high waisted shorts that honestly seem like a yeast infection waiting to happen because they go so far up into the nether regions. No thank you!

Before a recent trip to the mall, it felt like the odds were stacked against me in finding some shorts for summer that are a normal rise. I was kind of nervous, actually, because I haven’t bought shorts in forever so it needed to happen. The first boutique style store I went into was a bust. Literally all they had was high waisted shorts. And, just so no one could say I didn’t try, I even tried a pair on.

Spoiler Alert!

It was exactly what I expected it to be. My ass looked flat as a pancake and my torso and legs looked insanely stumpy. Not a good look. I was about to leave after the disappointing fitting room session in the boutique because I had already made purchases at other stores and figured that I could try again later. But, then, I decided to go to American Eagle Outfitters.

I have always really liked the way that AEO jeans fit me and I thought that they might have more options for shorts with a normal rise. And, my instinct was correct, because I was able to find two cute, normal rise shorts at buy one get one half off! Check it out:

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It was such a relief going into AEO and seeing an entire table of normal rise shorts, which I feel like never happens anymore. I was able to select from a bunch of different styles and colors and, for once, short shopping didn’t suck. These new shorties from American Eagle fit me just right, make me look fine from behind, and I don’t need to worry about having a permanent wedgie from a high rise. Score!

Do you prefer a normal, high, or mid rise when it comes to your clothes? What is a trend that you wish would go away or start up again? I want to hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

Mad Lib Hilarity

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Mad Lib Hilarity

Hiii everyone! A few days ago at work, I was filling mad libs out with my client, her sister, and her seven year old niece and it was honestly the funniest thing of my life. And, because one of the pages that we filled out was blog related, I had to share it with all of you. Enjoy!

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Lololol, I really just can’t. Us girls were laughing our little behinds off but the one that we especially lost it on was “Aunt B shaped earrings”. That is what my client’s nieces affectionately call her so when the kiddo suggested that as the noun we were dying! On another note, mad libs are a great way to teach children new words, grammar, and parts of sentences so if you’re looking for a fun way for your kids to learn something new, then give it a try.

Thanks for stopping by, Sarah.com fans! 😉

What is something funny that happened to you today? How do you make teaching something new more fun? I want to hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

One Of Those Mornings

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One Of Those Mornings

Hellooooooooo! Have you ever had one of those mornings where everything just seems to be so insanely UGH? It starts as soon as you wake up and it doesn’t end until you are caffeinated enough to get your shit together. When I’m tired, I normally suffer from a severe case of the dropsies and there is absolutely no telling where whatever is in my hand might end up. For example:

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Lol, yes that is my heat protecting spray. And, yes, it definitely landed in the toilet. Haha, thank gawd it was nearly empty, anyways! Not only did my hair care make a splash into the throne but so much makeup landed in the trash can and I honestly have no idea how that happened. I guess I’ll blame it on being tired and funnel some more coffee down my mouth? Yeah? Yeah.

All I can hope for all of you, my darlings, is that none of your morning routine essentials end up in the toilet. Because, if that doesn’t happen, then I would say you’re off to a pretty good start for your day! 😀

How does your body react when you are tired? How much sleep do you need to get yourself through another day? I want to hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

Colt Johnson Shout Out

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Colt Johnson Shout Out

Hi!! One of my Sunday evening traditions with my favorite cousin, Laura, who lives in Pittsburgh is watching 90 Day Fiance together. We love to watch the new episode and text the entire time, discussing the latest drama and making witty comments. If you watched the newest season on TLC, then you will know all about the craziness that was Colt, Larissa, and DEBBIE. Colt and Larissa were the couple that we all loved to hate and they provided Laura and I with endless hours of quality entertainment.

So, imagine my surprise when Laura emailed me a video of Colt, himself, talking directly to me! Lol, during Laura’s free time, she found a website where you can hire celebrities to make videos for you. She found Colt on the site and she couldn’t pass up the opportunity to get him to congratulate me on my status as a new aunt. Check this shit out:

Guys… I really just can’t. As soon as Colt started saying my name I immediately texted Laura with “wtf is happening?” Lol and when I realized that he was talking to me the hysterical freaking out began. I laughed so hard I almost cried and I just had to share this beautiful shout out with all of you. Even if you don’t watch 90 Day Fiance, there is no denying the hilarity of this video and I cannot wait to return the favor to Laura with her own special hello from Coltee. 😀

Who else is a 90 Day Fiance fan? Which couple do you love to hate on that show? I want to hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

Featured Image By: Casino

What Even?

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What Even?

Greetings! So I always see posts on Facebook about people finding money in their pockets or unlikely places. Yesterday, I saw someone make a status saying that he found sixty-seven bucks in a VHS tape that he bought at Goodwill! Lol, sadly, none of these happy money finding occasions happened to me. However, the most random thing fell out of my pants (…..) over the weekend and I thought it was funny, so I had to share it with all of you. Check it out:

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For about twenty-four hours, I was going about my day with a tiny crystal somewhere in my sweats. When I took them off when I woke up, I heard the faint metallic clatter as it fell to the ground and when I saw it I freaked out! I thought that one of my tooth gems or body jewelries came off. I inspected my teeth and piercings and everything looked okay, so I just had this random crystal lodged in my pants for god knows how long!

This story is basically my equivalent of finding money somewhere but, obviously, not as cool. It truly was one of those “what even” moments and I still have my little pants crystal sitting on my bathroom counter since it made its appearance. To whomever is reading this, I hope you have a crystal falling out of your pants type of day and lots of good fortune! #passiton lololol

What is the most random or lucky thing that you have found? Do you have any good luck charms? I want to hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah