Helloooo everyone and happy Monday!!! I had lots of fun celebrating the Fourth Of July this weekend and I hope all of you had a great time doing whatever it is that you did! My sister Kristen and I met up with our friends in Akron at Locke 3 to get our drink on and watch the fireworks. We walked around all of the different food trucks and activities and began our evening of drinking compliments of all of the beer stands! Once we assembled everyone who was invited we headed over to the bar and restaurant the Lockeview to sit on their rooftop patio, drink some more, and wait for the fireworks to start.
^^^ I had to!
The rooftop patio at the Lockeview was so perfect and all of the drinks that they had to offer were delicious and very moderately priced. While walking around the outdoor area everyone in the group was drinking beer and I decided to stick with that at the Lockeview. I had this super incredible raspberry beer that didn’t even taste like beer – we all agreed it tasted like drinking pop. After hanging around the patio for an hour or so it got dark enough outside for the fireworks to start. We had the best view of anyone who came to the event from the rooftop! The fireworks were awesome and they lasted for about fifteen minutes, which was a lot longer than I expected. I never really understood the fuss of celebrating the Fourth Of July before I turned twenty-one – but I can definitely see why people get into it after having my first legal drinking age experience!
After the fireworks show, Kristen and I stuck around for another half hour or so and then decided to head home. We had quite a bit of a walk from the Lockeview back to the parking garage and by the time we fought through the crowd of celebrators and got back to our car we both had to pee so bad. We should have went to the bathroom before we left but the line at the Lockeview was pretty long and we figured that we would be fine…We were dead wrong. The drive home was miserable and we both felt like we were going to explode but that didn’t stop us from getting Taco Bell! The line at the drive thru was surprisingly really short so we were able to get our burritos in record time, arrive back at home, AND PEE! #AMERICA
Kristen and I both had a blast getting our Fourth of July on. It was a much better time than what I was expecting so I was pleasantly surprised by how much I didn’t want to leave the festivities. We would have stayed much later but Kristen had to be at work early the following day – but that’s okay! There’s always next year! 😉 I hope that all of you had a wonderful weekend and a great start to your Monday! What is everyone up to this week? Any exciting plans? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah
Whatsup everyone and Happy Fourth Of July to those that celebrate! So this past week I finally met with a new psychiatrist after I had a disappointing falling out with my old pill pusher of seven years. Long story short, my final appointment with her resulted in me walking out and her never refilling my prescriptions. This ended up being a major shit show because I desperately needed my sleeping pills and antidepressants refilled because my prescription was almost gone. I only had about two days worth of medicine at the time and then I was donezo until I could get someone to fill my prescription. Multiple phone calls were made to my old psychiatrist’s office but she never followed through and at that point I was fresh out of my pills. I’ve been on a very high dose of Trazodone for years because I literally can’t sleep without it and I’ve been on Effexor for close to a year for depression and anxiety. And because my doctor was an asshole, I was without my medicine for almost an entire week….It was legitimately the worst time of my life.
I think people think that I’m exaggerating when I say that I can’t sleep without my pills – but I can’t sleep without my pills. In the five days that I was without my Trazodone I probably slept a total of twelve hours or less. It’s that bad. Some nights I was up all night, other nights I was lucky to catch two hours of sleep. It was just so hard because on top of being completely exhausted from little to no sleep, I was starting to feel the effects of medication withdrawal as well. I went from taking my pills every day for years to stopping them completely without weening myself off. This resulted in flu like symptoms and I was basically in zombie mode for five days. It was honestly pretty scary. I felt like a shell of myself. I was so weak and so fucking tired. I looked like a straight up junkie – my eyes looked hollowed out from the dark circles that appeared from lack of sleep and I had no appetite so I was barely eating which made me look very frail and paler than usual. I was a hot, hot mess. Thankfully on day six of no meds, the emergency psychiatrist on call at a local hospital looked through my files and felt comfortable refilling my prescriptions. She was seriously an angel and that first night of being able to sleep again was the most amazing thing in the entire world.
That paragraph doesn’t even begin to describe the physical turmoil and mental exhaustion that my sleepless nights resulted in thanks to my ex-psychiatrist. So when I met with my new one this week and told her about what happened she was extremely sympathetic and began asking me more questions about my sleeping habits. She then diagnosed me with insomnia which was never brought up with my old doctor. I’ve always known that my sleeping problems were more severe than just the occasional sleepless night. Sometimes I can’t sleep even when I do take my medicine, which is enough Trazodone to knock out a horse. It was very comforting to have my issue diagnosed with an actual name. I never really brought up the “I word” with my old psychiatrist because I figured that after seven years she would have diagnosed me by now. So being seen by someone with a fresh pair of eyes who was able to address the problem within fifteen minutes of meeting me felt awesome. This brings me immense relief because now I know that no matter what psychiatrist I end up at in the next few years I’ll never have to argue to keep my dose of sleeping pills high or have to explain myself about it.
I definitely feel a lot better after meeting with my new psychiatrist and feel very comforted in knowing that I have this new diagnosis in my file now. I really liked my new doctor and am looking forward to my next appointment with her! I hope that all of you are having a fabulous day so far! Are you celebrating the Fourth Of July? Are you up to anything fun this weekend? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah
Hellooooo everyone and happy Thursday! Welcome to a newest edition of If The Shoe Fits – Steve Madden style! This post is compliments of the suggestion from my friend at HKD so major shout outs to her! I’m actually really excited to talk about this special pair of Steve Madden’s because they were the very first pair of heels that Lil Red ever owned. Take a look at some pics and then let’s discuss!
Alright, so who wants to take a guess on how old these beauties are? I’ll give you a hint…I got them when I was in eighth grade, so that makes them SEVEN years old! Talk about an oldie but goodie! So here’s the story behind the heels that started my ever growing collection…
Once upon a time when I was but a wee girl I was forced into going to a Catholic grade school. (Thanks a lot mom and dad.) That school was the literal bane of my existence and I hated every day there more passionately than the last. Eighth grade is the year that the students get confirmed and quite frankly, I wanted nothing to do with it. I’ve been a firm nonbeliever since I was as young as I can remember, but once again my parents made me go through with the confirmation ceremony. I begrudgingly accepted this since there was nothing that I could really do at thirteen to make them change their mind. The only thing that I was looking forward to about the entire affair was the fact that I got to go shopping for a new dress and shoes for the event. Even as a youngin, Lil Red loved to shop!
My style has always been unique and for the confirmation ceremony I purchased an absolutely gorgeous Erin Featherson dress from her collection for Target. I’ll never forget it….it was a little black party dress with indigo and fuchsia bunnies all over it. It was so fabulous. Now I needed the perfect pair of shoes to go with my new dress. If I wasn’t going to enjoy myself during an evening in church, then by god I was going to look amazing. After I found my dress my mom took me to Famous Footwear to get some shoes to complete the look – and what happened next began my long journey to shoe slut status.
The entire time my mom and I were in Famous she kept on pointing out flats. Flats, flats, flats. Boring, boring, boring. I rolled my eyes at each suggestion and as I was browsing I found inner peace in the Steve Madden section. The shoes were incredible. They were like nothing I’ve ever seen before – sharp, sleek wedges and heels in every shape and color imaginable. My eyes locked on the pair of strappy black wooden heels and I knew at that moment that those were it. I was going to strut my stuff down that church aisle way at confirmation like nobody’s business! I showed my mom the heels and she immediately rejected them, but I tried them on anyways…(insert suspenseful music here.)
I slipped on my first pair of heels and something inside of me clicked…they just felt so right. Once the shoes were on I hesitantly stood up and took my first wobbly steps in those beautiful wooden Steve Madden’s. After my first few steps my confidence grew and I was able to fully savor the moment of taking my first walk in heels…words can’t even describe how it felt. The way the heels made my legs look long, the way they fit to perfection, and the glorious noise of the wooden heels clacking on the floor – I absolutely loved it.
As soon as the shoes were on there was no turning back and my mom bought me my very first pair of heels. Best believe I rocked them like no other at my eighth grade confirmation and I still break them out to this day. Steve Madden remains one of my all time favorites for shoes and because they’re such excellent quality I know that I’ll have my pairs of Steve Madden’s for forever. Thank god. 😉
So there you have it, the newest issue of If The Shoe Fits – Steve Madden Edition! So now I need your help on what shoe I should write about next week. Your choices are between black knee high Carlos Santana gladiator sandals, floral print Elle heels, or primary color Calico kitten heels. I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! And thanks again to HKD for this weeks suggestion! Much love. -Sarah
Heyyy everyone and happy Tuesday! I hope you’re all having a great day so far! So after an entire month of waiting, tonight is finally the night of the AWOLNATION concert at the House Of Blues in Cleveland!!! I’m seriously SO excited I could cry! After notifying my older brother that one of my favorite bands was going to be in Cleveland, he bought me two tickets for my birthday…What a guy. Family Of The Year and some other band is opening and I’m actually really looking forward to that too because I like Family Of The Year a lot. I’m definitely curious about who the other opener is going to be! My sister is such a champ because she’s coming with me to the show even though she doesn’t know one song by AWOLNATION. I’m so happy that she’s coming with me because she’s the only one who I feel comfortable going super hard with – and I plan on it! Hella screaming, hella jumping around, and hella dancing my ass off. If I were to bring a friend with me, I would probably end up feeling pretty self conscious about my fan girling and end up just standing there looking like a goon. -_-
This will be my third night out at the House Of Blues in a month and a half since I recently saw The Used and Glass Animals performing there. I’m a big fan of HOB because it’s such an intimate venue so I’m really hoping that if my sister and I show up early enough that we’ll be able to get pretty close to the stage. The doors open at seven and I plan on leaving around five fifteen or so to make the forty-five minute drive up there. I have no problem waiting in line for an hour if that means that I’ll get a good standing area…Now I just have to convince sissy to be down with that plan! #SAIL
I can’t wait for tonight. I’m already counting down the hours! I’ll be looking forward to telling you guys all about it tomorrow! Until then, have you been to any concerts recently? Who did you see? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah
Helllooo everyone and happy Monday! I’ve been doing weekly Woman Crush Wednesday posts as of late so I figured now would be a good time to give the guys a shout out with some Man Crush Monday posts! My very first subject for #MCM should be a given if you know anything about Lil Red and it’s a gent that I love very much – the talented and handsome Mr. Jack White! ❤
Dearest Jack White,
Oh Jack White you drop dead gorgeous hunka hunk of burning love, welcome to the world of lifewithlilred! Words truly cannot express my deep and passionate love/lust for you. I’ve been listening to your music since I was a little girl so it’s safe to say that you are definitely on my top five list of Lil Red’s Favorite Artists. Your talent is unreal and your good looks are staggering, so hubba hubba to you, sir. I appreciate all of your musical endeavors more than you know and find so much joy in listening to any and all of it – The White Stripes, The Raconteurs, The Dead Weather, your amazing solo work…even albums that you make brief appearances on like Danger Mouse’s “Rome” – I love it all. In fact, one of my favorite musical activities is putting all of your various albums on shuffle and listening to them throughout the day. What I enjoy the most about your music is that there’s always a song waiting for me in my Jack White collection that speaks to whatever emotion that I’m feeling at the time. Your music has been there for me to listen to on countless occasions – my first day of college, auditions, tragedies, and success…and for that, I salute you. I LOVE YOU so much (just in case you forgot) AND I’m very pale with red hair which I know you like, so feel free to ask me for my hand in marriage anytime!
^^^ GOOD LORD!!! What a man, what a man, what a man, what a mighty good man.
Well now that I’m significantly hot and bothered, I guess I should get back to the Tri-C homework grind! I hope that all of you are having a great day so far! Who is your Man Crush Monday? What’s one of your favorite musical endeavors from Jack White? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah
Helloooo everyone and happy Saturday! So if there’s one thing that Lil Red loves, it’s shoes, shoes, and more shoes! With a collection of almost fifty shoes and counting it’s safe to say that I’m a big fat shoe SLUT…and that’s so okay with me! I thought that it would be fun to introduce a new segment to lifewithlilred and I fell in love with the idea of discussing all of my pretty little shoe babies one by one. The idea for “If The Shoe Fits” was conceived last night, so welcome to the first edition – Juicy Couture style!
^^^ They’re so pretty!!!
I had lots of different shoes in mind to talk about first, but I thought that my Juicys would be appropriate to help ring in the new segment considering I wore them yesterday and got at least ten compliments on them. I got these bad boys about a month and a half ago at Kohl’s for around sixty dollars and I haven’t been so happy with a purchase in a long time. These funky wedges are SO unique and I’ve never seen anything like them before, therefore, I had to have them! It was truly love at first sight when I saw these pretties for the first time and the love grew deeper when I slipped the size 6 1/2 on and they fit like a glove. After they were on my feet and I could examine them in the mirror and strut about in them, I knew that they were going to become one of my favorite pairs of heels…and I was right! There’s something about my Juicys that remind me of bowling shoes and I can’t put my finger on it. Some of you might find that as a turn off, but not me! When I was in high school, I bought a pair of bowling shoes from the Goodwill and best believe I rocked them like no other! So clearly, Lil Red is pro bowling shoes, pro wedges, and pro Juicy Couture to the extreme!
When I was wearing my pretties yesterday while I was out and about I got so many compliments that I can’t even keep track of them. One lady told me that she usually “wasn’t one to go gaga over shoes” but mine were the exception! So I guess that’s how you know that they’re fabulous! I love wearing my Juicys with sweet floral dresses and my black super skinnies. My featured image photo is from my brother’s graduation last month where I broke my wedges in for the first time…It was a historic event. The graduation was a historic event…and so were the shoes! 😉
^^^ Material Girl jams!
I hope that all of you are having a great weekend so far! So now you tell me – what shoes should I write about next? Your choices are between black Vera Wang lace up wedges, Carlos Santana knee high gladiator sandals, or Steve Madden wooden heels! I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah
Whatupp everyone and happy Thursday! I feel like I’ve discussed a lot of really fun subjects lately, but have any of them really described how I’m personally feeling? (Other than drunk…welcome to the blog of a freshly turned twenty-one year old!) The answer is NO, so I figured now would be a good time to tell you all about the direction my life is heading in that I so lovingly bestowed the title the Lil Red Path Of Righteousness upon. What is the #LRPOR you might ask? I’m so glad you did!
What it is: The LRPOR is the way that I choose to live my life…Or am trying to live my life, anyways. It’s all about accepting where I am at the moment and not comparing myself to others. I find that one of my biggest character flaws is constantly playing the compare and contrast game with people – friends, family, complete strangers…and that needs to stop ASAP. No one but me knows what’s right for me, so I need to start trusting my own judgement more because I’m actually a lot smarter than I give myself credit for. I’m honestly a lot more of everything than I give myself credit for – pretty, personable, witty, talented…But I’m such a modest person and sometimes my self esteem isn’t the best so I need to start showing myself a bit more love. Because the LRPOR is a lifestyle focus on self acceptance I’m hoping that my self esteem will get to a steady place. My fingers are also crossed that with this new habit of embracing myself that my urges to self harm or purge will diminish. I haven’t had any incidents of mutilation in a while, but unfortunately I still think about it a lot. The constant battle of willpower to not cut or vomit is exhausting so if the urges were to decrease even slightly, then that would be a victory in itself. So not only is the Lil Red Path Of Righteousness a way to get me to appreciate myself but it’s also a safety plan to keep my urges at bay. It’s a win, win, win, win situation!
^^^ Current blogging soundtrack!
^^^ #lilred #beentrill
So is success from following on the Lil Red Path Of Righteousness going to happen over night? No. But I’m glad I have a game plan for the time being! Now all I can do is continue to walk along the LRPOR (which I like to think of as a red bricked road) and keep on doing my best! I hope all of you are having a fabulous day so far! What’s a personal lifestyle choice that you follow? Do you have a name for it? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah
Hellooooo everyone and welcome to another issue of Woman Crush Wednesday! This week the coveted honor of being Lil Red’s Woman Crush goes to…..GWEN STEFANI!!!
^^^ AYYY! #WCW
Dear Gwen Stefani,
Oh sweet Gwen, you beautiful little starlet! I so admire your talent and your amazing fashion endeavors. I had the pleasure of seeing you perform in No Doubt when I was fifteen and was blown away by your show-woman-ship and rockin bod. So for that, it is only fitting that you receive a hubba hubba! Everything that you do, I love – fronting No Doubt, your solo career, coaching on The Voice, and all of your amazing clothing lines. I have countless Harajuku Lovers purses and fragrances as well as your perfume for L.A.M.B.! You are so fabulous and creative and I always look to you for celebrity style inspiration. Thank you for giving me music that I can sing poorly to while driving the Little Red Love Machine. Thank you for creating clothing lines to bring some of your flawless style to a gal in Akron, Ohio. And thank you very much for creating fragrances that keep me smelling “Yummy” on the daily! I LOVE YOU!
^^^ She’s so gorgeous I just can’t even! And miss thang can rock a red lip like no other! Hoochie mama. :*)
So there you have it, my Woman Crush Wednesday: Gwen Stefani Edition! I hope that all of you are having a fabulous Hump Day! Who’s your Woman Crush Wednesday? What’s one of your favorite creative endeavors from Gwen Stefani? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah
Whatupppp everyone and happy Hump Day! This Funky Time Jams post is brought to you by my hangover and my deep passion for Bedtime Music. If there’s one thing that I love, it’s falling asleep to some soothing tunes. I have a plethora of go to artists in my vast collection that I play when it’s time to hit the hay for the night and they never fail to send me off to dream land peacefully. The trick to good bedtime music is that it literally has to be “just right”. So here’s my Lil Red Rules to bedtime music before we discuss some tried and true favorites:
1) The music can’t be too upbeat because you don’t want to get hyped up instead of worn out.
2) The vocalist needs to have a voice that soothes you, obviously.
3) Songs with piano playing is always a good thing!
4) The songs need to take you to your pre-sleep happy place.
Alright, here we go!
Enya – Orinoco Flow: Freaking OBVIOUSLY. Out of all of my bedtime music artists, Enya is the one that I play most frequently. I just love her – even though I never understand what she’s singing about half of the time. All I know is that Enya soothes a Lil Red like no other. Her music is pure poetry and it takes me to places in my mind that are good for the soul…shopping in Paris, shopping in London, shopping anywhere. It’s a magical thing. Enya has saved me from many a sleepless night and for that, I salute you.
Coldplay – Speed Of Sound: Of course Coldplay had to be included on this list. I had a difficult time selecting which Coldplay song to feature on here, but then I thought back to yesterday when “Speed Of Sound” came on my iPod when I had it on shuffle and just how much I enjoyed it. I seriously forgot how much I love this song. I’m a really big Coldplay fan – they were my first concert when I was in fifth grade or so. (Richard Ashcroft from The Verve was the opener and they performed “Bittersweet Symphony” together and it was life changing!) My brother chose to take me over his stupid girlfriend at the time and it’s always been one of my favorite memories. I also figure skated to “Talk” during competitions. Coldplay holds a very special, sentimental place in my heart and their music makes me happy – which is why they’re a great band to play before bed!
Cat Power – I Found a Reason: Oh dear lord I love this song – specifically because it’s featured in one of my all time favorite movies, V For Vendetta. Cat Power’s voice is so hauntingly beautiful. Her music is the kind that you would expect to hear in one of those jewelry boxes that I feel like every little girl has when they’re growing up…You know, the kind where you open up the lid and music starts playing and the ballerina or whatever starts spinning around. Those jewelry boxes.
Wolf Parade – Dear Sons And Daughters Of Hungry Ghosts: I know I said to avoid upbeat music before bed, but Wolf Parade is my exception. Spencer Krug’s voice is simply intoxicating and it legitimately puts me under a spell every time I hear it. Maybe that’s why I can listen to them while I’m laying in bed at night and feel sleepy, because I’m under a weird Indie rock love spell. “Dear Sons And Daughters Of Hungry Ghosts” is a fucking brilliant track, and if you’ve never heard of Wolf Parade then this is a perfect song to introduce you to them with. Make sure you pay close attention to the lyrics because they’re fantastic. The video I’m posting is great too because it includes their hit “I’ll Believe In Anything” as well which is one of my all time favorite songs in the history of ever.
Say Hi To Your Mom – Let’s Talk About Spaceships: If you want some really good Indie bedtime music, then Say Hi To Your Mom is one of your best bets. I love this guy too much and I’m actually really excited because I’ve wanted to see him in concert for years and he’s finally coming to Cleveland in October!! HURRAY! “Let’s Talk About Spaceships” was one of the first songs I ever heard by Say Hi To Your Mom and the only reason I even discovered this artist is because years ago when my brother and I were browsing through Best Buy we saw his CD’s and thought his name was absolutely hysterical. I had to investigate his music as soon as I got home and I fell in love. This track opens with one of my favorite lyrics of “And what’s that saying again? They’re only words and words can’t kill me.” I’ve never considered this song one of my favorites but honestly I think it’s safe to say that it’s one of my favorites. I’ve loved it since I was fourteen and I still love it seven years later.
Sufjan Stevens – Detroit, Lift Up Your Weary Head! (Rebuild! Restore! Reconsider!): Once again, if you’re looking for some really good Indie bedtime music, Sufjan Stevens is also a good way to go. “Detroit, Lift Up Your Weary Head!” is probably one of my favorite Sufjan songs for reasons I can’t tell you, because I have no clue why. In the words of Matthew Mcconaughey in those stupid Lincoln commercials, “I just like it”. One of the reasons why I like to play some Sufjan before bed is because all of his songs are quite long, so you can easily lose yourself in the ten minute tracks and before you know it you’re asleep. INDUSTRY! INDUSTRY!
U2 – Sleep Like a Baby Tonight: Okay, 1) Did you honestly think that I would pass up an opportunity to post music by my favorite band in the whole wide world? and 2) The answer for posting this song is all in the name of it. The end. Wait…no, not the end! Because now I have to discuss just how disappointed I am that U2 isn’t coming to Ohio on their Innocence + Experience Tour! So Bono, if you’re reading this: I love you! AND COME TO OHIO!
So there you have it, the Funky Time Jams: Bedtime Music Edition! If you’re having trouble sleeping, definitely give some of these songs and artists a try and let me know how they work out! Who’s your go to bedtime music artist? What songs succeed in making you sleepy? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah
Heyy everyone and happy Tuesday! This post is going out to all of my day dream believers on here because I know you’re out there and I need your help!! The past two nights in a row I’ve been having dreams that involve two people who I absolutely despise. Each night has been a different person and the weird thing about the dreams is that they are actually quite pleasant scenarios but the fact that someone who I hate is in them completely ruins the dreaming experience. I won’t go into great detail about who’s in the dreams because you never know who’s reading lifewithlilred and the internet is a big place! But I will tell you that I stopped talking to the people who are featured in Dream One and Dream Two months and months and months ago and barely ever think about them – so why the hell are they showing up now?? #GOAWAY!!!
The setting of Dream One which happened on Sunday was that this person and I were walking on a beach and talking. I don’t remember what we were talking about – but I do recall that we weren’t walking by the water, we were on the sand and the ocean seemed really far away. I remember the dream being really enjoyable while I was having it but when I woke up the following morning I was completely disgusted by the fact that I had a good dream that included one of my least favorite people ever.
Dream Two occurred last night and I vividly remember the set of it being in the Target clothing section. Similarly to Dream One it involved a movement, which was shopping and then talking. Once again, I don’t remember what the conversations were about I just remember the action in the dream. I feel like this dream didn’t last as long as Dream One, but all the same when I woke up I felt pretty annoyed that my dreams have been hijacked by assholes two nights in a row.
So what do these back to back dreams mean? I certainly hope it doesn’t mean that I should rekindle a relationship with people who I said good riddance to forever ago! Usually I’m never curious about what my dreams mean or whatever but when I get visited in dream land by someone who I don’t like two nights in a row it seems more than coincidental.
So to anyone who is into finding secret meanings in dreams that’s reading this…Help a Lil Red out!!! Was there some hidden meaning that I’m missing? Am I concerned over nothing? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah
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