Tag Archives: wasteypants

Monday Update: A Moment Of Silence Edition

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Monday Update: A Moment Of Silence Edition

Hey everyone and happy Monday!! So this weekend was full of exciting, shameful, and not too noisy events so let’s get to it and discuss in this Monday Update: A Moment Of Silence Edition:

Let’s start with some good news: One of my best friends on the planet, Tyler, came home for the long Labor Day weekend! Tyler is currently enlisted in the Army and lives in California. He began his journey in October of last year and that was also the last time that I saw him until yesterday! Tyler was so insanely busy this weekend, as there was a wedding he had to attend on top of all of the friends and family that he had to see, so I am SO incredibly thankful that he was able to pencil me in!

Tyler stopped over at my place for an hour or so bearing Pumpkin Spice Latte frappachinos and infinite hugs to ease my ugly crying. I seriously can’t even describe to you guys what it felt like to see him and hug him for the first time in an entire year. When he got out of the car I ran into his arms at full speed and he held me and let me cry for as long as I needed to. I knew for a fact that I was going to be emotional during our reunion but I had no idea that it was going to be like that! The only way I can describe seeing him again was perfect. It was really really perfect.

After lots of hugs and crying outside, we went into my house for chit chatting and staring at each other in disbelief that we were finally together in real life. Hanging out with him felt exactly like it did when he lived in Ohio – our banter was endless and effortless and we were able to laugh at the dumbest little things. I’m so happy that Tyler and I communicate frequently via text and FaceTime because we were able to talk about our most recent endeavors and stories rather than cram a years worth of information into one hour.

I wish that our hour together could have gone on forever but like all good things, it had to end. Before we even exited my house I was already crying. It didn’t feel fair that one of my best friends was finally standing in front of me in the flesh rather than on a phone screen and he had to leave so soon. Seeing Tyler for the first time resulted in tears of joy but my goodbye tears were the epitome of ugly crying. Even though Tyler had places to go, he let me hug him and give him an abundance of cheek kisses for another five minutes before he drove off. He’s so sweet! :*)

Almost a year ago, Tyler and I had a very similar interaction when he left for California and I’ll tell you what – the goodbyes never get any easier. As we texted later that afternoon he described our get together as “bittersweet” and I couldn’t have said it better myself. The bittersweet-ness was so real considering my first tears were so happy and my goodbye ones were of the purest sadness. There’s things that you forget about people when you haven’t seen them in so long. I couldn’t believe that I forgot Tyler’s staggering height – especially in comparison to mine. I forgot the way that when we hug my head doesn’t even reach his shoulders. I forgot what it felt like to hear his voice with my own ears rather than on a speaker. Tyler is always going to be one of my best friends and the fact that we haven’t seen each other in forever but could pick up right where we left off completely solidified that for me. I love him so so much and I can’t wait for the holiday season so he can come home again soon! ❤

Now let’s get to the part of the Update where we tie the title into one of my stories. As I mentioned last week, mama was not feeling too hot at all and unfortunately, I still feel like hell! Hurrayyy! The remnants of my sickness when the weekend rolled around was a sore throat. Now the remnants of my sore throat is that my voice is completely gone! Allow me to explain:

Long story short, Saturday was a day of intense drinking for me. While I was sick during the week, I wasn’t smoking at all but of course, when I drink, I always smoke like a damn cowboy. During my drinking excursions, I managed to cough through a half a pack of ciggies and told myself that I’d be fine after. APPARENTLY NOT! I was on my Lindsay Lohan too hard and when I woke up Sunday morning it was almost comical to see myself open my mouth to speak and have nothing come out. Luckily, I had about two hours of salvageable speaking in the morning because I would have been so devastated if I couldn’t talk with Tyler!

ANYWHO, for the remainder of Sunday my day was spent mouthing words or writing out short phrases on a notepad to communicate. I figured that after a day of resting my tired voice that I would be fine…APPARENTLY NOT! I woke up this morning eager to test my pipes out and nothing came out. I kind of felt like the Little Mermaid though…so that was cool. My Moments Of Silence have turned into a day and a half of not speaking and honestly I’m going fucking crazy. It frustrated me to the point that I was almost crying yesterday when I wanted to tell my family something and literally couldn’t. So if everyone could take a Moment Of Silence and send some good vibes Lil Red’s way, I’d be forever grateful and will join you in your moment…because I have no other choice. #FML

^^^ This video was basically me this weekend. SHAMEFUL!

So there you have it, this week’s Monday Update: A Moment Of Silence Edition! How was everyone’s weekend? Does anyone have any fun Labor Day plans? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

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Man Crush Monday: Lil Wayne Edition

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Man Crush Monday: Lil Wayne Edition

Helloooo everyone and happy Monday!! Welcome to another edition of Man Crush Monday – Lil Wayne style! Pleeease judge me for it! I’ve had a crush on Weezy since I was fourteen years old so it only seems appropriate to give him some #MCM love! Let’s discuss:

Dear Lil Wayne,

First of all, do you mind if I call you Wayne? Ehh…We’ll just stick with Lil Wayne. ANYWAYS, I think you are so insanely handsome, much to the disagreement of a lot of my friends! But I can’t help it – your tattoos, dreads, and lip piercings really rev my engine. Hubba hubba. Now that we’ve talked about your staggering good looks, it’s time for a story featuring a teenage Lil Red: Once upon a time when I was fourteen years old, you were performing at Blossom Music Center and one of my girlfriends and I got tickets to see the show. That was when Drake had a hernia and had to cancel being your opening act, but I digress. So yes, my friend and I had tickets to your show and we were SO excited! And then a travesty occurred. My evil sister informed my mom of the vulgarity of your lyrics and I was condemned to a night stuck at home rather than at your concert. Luckily, I was a crafty bitch. Around the time of the concert I was involved in a theatre performance and I told my mom that I had a rehearsal with a cast party after the night of your show. My mom said that this was fine and my friend and I were thrilled because little to my parents’ knowledge, we were going to your concert! Unfortunately, I got too turnt at Blossom and I don’t remember much of the show other than making out with two different guys – but that’s neither here nor there. Despite the lack of memories of my night on the town, I do know that I had a blast and I was pretty hyped that my parents had no idea. I kept my teenage betrayal against my parents’ wishes a secret until I turned eighteen and then I told my mom. At that point, all she could do was laugh at my sneakiness and ability to keep my lips sealed about that night for four years straight. I lied to my parents to see you live and if I had to, I would do it all over again…Except I wouldn’t get so drunk. I LOVE YOU!!!!

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^^^ What a babe! Fun fact for ya: I have that picture of him in the red hat in poster form and it’s currently hanging on my ceiling in my room!

So there you have it, this weeks Man Crush Monday: Lil Wayne Edition! Who is your #MCM this week? What is your favorite creative endeavor from my man crush? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

It Was A Good Day

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It Was A Good Day

Heyyy everyone and TGIF! Sorry that I was MIA yesterday – Lil Red was a busy gal! Despite the somewhat stressful parts that occurred, I gotta say it was a good day. Let’s discuss:

My day began with running errands until mid morning or so when I had a lovely hang out with my old skating coach, Sarah, and her precious little girls, Charlotte and Brooklyn. It was a surprisingly hot day in Ohio, so we walked over to the local park so Charlotte could play in the wading pool while Sarah and I caught up on all of each others latest news. I always enjoy the times that I get to see Sarah and her darling family. I love all of their company and it’s so fun seeing how much both of the girls grow each time I see them!

Once I got home from the park, I had to finish my last exam for my summer classes…the dreaded math final. DUN DUN DUNNNNNN. All afternoon I checked and rechecked my final until I was satisfied and prepared my scanner at home to send it over to my professor. All summer my scanner worked perfectly and I never had a problem with it, so naturally it would stop working the day I needed to send my final in. For an hour I tried to fix the scanner on my own with the ancient 90’s technique of turning it off and turning it back on as well as unplugging and replugging it. Unfortunately, none of my efforts worked and at that point I was completely freaking out. My exam had to be turned in by the 31st and I refused to use the lame excuse of “my scanner broke” to my professor. I’m sure that an email complaining of technical problems would be answered with “nice try” anyways. -_____-

After lots of deep breaths, I decided to call tech support for the scanner and thankfully after an hour we were able to work together and fix the problem. My final got sent in with plenty of time to spare and I could finally stop having a stress induced heart attack. I think I did pretty well on my math test and I know for a fact that I did great on both my Sociology and Social Psychology class – I got a perfect one hundred on my Sociology final! HOLLA!

After my disastrous afternoon of technical difficulties, I had a wonderful hang out with my sweet friend, Cat, to look forward to. Cat was one of my sales associates at PacSun and she also happened to be one of my favorites! We had a fabulous evening of manicures and martinis at my bar of choice, the Cashmere Cricket. Thursday night is ladies night, so their delicious martinis are only five dolla holla and you can’t beat that! Our night consisted of pampering, girly drinks, and lots of laughs – it was seriously perfect. I’m so glad that Cat and I have remained friends outside of work because I just adore her. You know that you have a good friend when the first thing you say to your mom when you walk in the door is how much fun you had/how much you love your drinking partner! ❤

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Yesterday was the best kind of busy and for the most part I enjoyed every minute of it! I hope all of you guys had as great of a day as I did! What is everyone up to this weekend? Any fun plans? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

Monday Update: Weekend Wedding Edition

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Monday Update: Weekend Wedding Edition

Helloooo everyone and happy Monday! I hope all of you had a fabulous weekend – I know I did! I spent the weekend surrounded by my family and friends for the wedding of my brother, Peter, and his wife, Megan. Peter and Megan met each other during their undergrad years at Notre Dame, so my family and I packed up the car and drove to Indiana on Friday for the festivities. Saying that it was a beautiful weekend is the understatement of the century, so let’s discuss!

Friday was a pretty laid back day in comparison to Saturday, which was the day of the wedding. We arrived in South Bend, Indiana around three and then headed to a hotel for a bridal shower for Megan. It was a lot of fun getting to meet all of Megan’s family and her darling bridesmaids, Emily, Keaton, Andrea, and Jennifer. What I enjoyed the most about Megan’s bridal shower was watching her interact with all of her friends and family without Peter there. That was my first time seeing Megan without my brother in a social situation and it made me like her even more! After the bridal shower, we checked in to the hotel we were staying at to freshen up before the rehearsal wedding and dinner. Here’s a few selfies that my sister, Kristen, and I snapped before we left:

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^^^ Lol, I captioned our mirror pic “Just married” on Facebook!

The wedding rehearsal didn’t take long at all, which was great for me because I was SO hungry!! The rehearsal dinner was held at Papa Vino’s – the same restaurant where Peter and Megan had their first date. Papa Vino’s serves family style Italian food and it was so incredibly delicious. Plates and bowls of pasta, pizza, bread, dips, and desserts just kept coming and coming and I ate until I couldn’t take another bite. The evening was full of great food and conversation and by the time it came to an end, we were all beyond stuffed and tired. I was so ready for bed, so I was pretty happy when Megan’s family, my family, and the bridal party parted ways until the following morning for the wedding!

Peter and Megan’s wedding ceremony was held at the Basilica Of The Sacred Heart on Notre Dame’s campus and it is absolutely stunning. I could spend hours looking at all of the artwork and architecture that the church offers. The mass began promptly at eleven, but I was already crying well before then…I was so emotional! Watching Megan walk down the aisle with her father and watching Peter’s eyes get teary was my favorite part of the wedding. Megan looked drop dead gorgeous and Peter didn’t look too bad either! I was pretty shocked that my dad was crying during the wedding, which made my mom cry, which then made me cry. It was a big ol’ sob fest – but they were happy tears! The ceremony was elegant, sophisticated, and completely perfect. Peter and Megan looked so happy and in love and I really just can’t even.

After the mass it was time for pictures with the families and the bridal party. We took some photos in the church and then headed to the Notre Dame football field for some more photography fun. It was so cool being able to hang out on the football field as well as the football teams’ locker room for a Notre Dame style photo shoot. The pictures ranged from the bridal party in huddle formation around Peter and Megan in the locker room to an impromptu football game on the field. It was so fun watching all of these silly scenarios happen and it was such an awesome experience being able to explore the field and locker room. I got a picture in the locker room showers and when Kristen and I were opening some of the lockers we found a pair of boxers and a jock guard…SCANDALOUS!!! My cover photo is the bridal party in its entirety compliments of the photo shoot, starting from left to right: Emily, Jennifer, Andrea, Keaton, Megan, Peter, Michael, Andrew (my brother!), Brian, and Thomas. What an attractive group of people!

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^^^ Take note of how Peter wrote his and Megan’s names and wedding date on the locker room whiteboard! So cute!!!

While the bridal party continued their photo shoot throughout the campus, my parents, Kristen, and I returned to our hotel to prepare for the wedding reception. Makeup was touched up, hair was straightened, deodorant was applied and then we were off to the country club where the reception was held. The open bar cocktail hour began at five and best believe that Kristen and I got turnt right from the get go. By the time dinner was served around six thirty, I was already five glasses of moscato in and feeling wonderful. The vegetarian entree for dinner was excellent, it was a pasta primavera and my only regret is that I didn’t eat more! After dinner, Megan’s dad and my mom gave a toast and then it was time for the father/daughter and mother/son dance. My mom and Peter danced to the best of their ability and it was actually really good! Take a look at some pics of the mother/son dance and the blushing bride and groom:

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^^^ I LOVE THEM!!!

After all of the traditional toasts and dances were complete, the dance floor was opened to everyone. Kristen and I continued to throw back wine and danced our asses off with all of our family and friends. Halfway through the reception I was white girl wasted and I don’t remember much about the rest of the night other than how much fun I had! I do remember falling right on my knee on the dance floor because people kept spilling their drinks and it was really slippery. I now have a nasty purple and black bruise taking up the majority of my left knee. Hurray! I don’t remember breaking a nail. I do remember laying on the floor with Jennifer and Andrea to complain about said broken nail. I don’t remember how many glasses of wine I ended up drinking. I do remember having an amazing time…I also remember mentioning that already! I danced with everyone from my parents, my brothers, my sister, my cousins, Megan, the bridesmaids, the groomsmen, and a bunch of other people whose names I can’t recall. GREAT SUCCESS! (Except for the being sweaty part…that was gross.)

By the time the reception was over, Kristen and I were completely out of it and ready for bed. My family and I drove back to Ohio the following day around noon and returned safe and sound in the early evening. The entire weekend was incredible and I am so thankful to have been a part of it. I adore my new sister-in-law like no other and I’m so excited for what the future holds for the newlyweds! Peter and Megan will be leaving for their three week honeymoon in Italy today and I wish them nothing but blissful fun and safe travels. I LOVE YOU PETER AND MEGAN!!!

So there you have it, the Monday Update: Weekend Wedding Edition! I hope all of you enjoyed reading this post just as much as I did writing it! What was everyone up to this weekend? Anything exciting? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

Monday Update: Old Faithful Edition

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Monday Update: Old Faithful Edition

Heyy everyone and happy Monday! Sorry that I was MIA this weekend – I was pretty busy with school and reuniting with some of my old tried and true favorite friends. Because of these fabulous hang outs I had an awesome weekend despite one unfortunate encounter! Let’s discuss.

Friday night was absolute perfection minus throwing up for a half hour in my front yard. My darling boy, Seth, took me out for a night of drinking frivolities and heart to hearts. After a bottle of wine and four vodka sours it’s safe to say that Lil Red got white girl wasted! Seth took really good care of a bitch and was such a trooper the entire night, even when I was super sloppy. He’s handsome and kind and a real keeper – especially considering that he had to witness me puking my brains out and made sure that I got in the house okay instead of peaceing out. Seth and I have known each other for over six years now and he still manages to blow me away when I see him. What a guy! Lucky me! 🙂

cuteee

^^^ That picture was from the last time we hung out for my birthday! Isn’t he such a cutie?

On Saturday I woke up with the worst hangover in the history of ever, so I spent a lot of the morning and afternoon laying in bed and being miserable. But I had to get up eventually because my beloved basic ass Pantech phone decided to completely stop working. After making myself presentable and eating half of my weight in carbs, my mom and I headed to the Verizon store to get me a new cellie. I’m very anti smart phone simply for the fact that it saves money by not having one so I just went with the basic ass Cosmos to replace my basic ass Pantech. I can text and make phone calls on my new phone and that’s all that really matters to me!

My day on Saturday was going pretty well despite my lingering headache and constant cotton mouth. However, a run in with my ex best friend at Starbucks made my evening kind of sucky f0r three minutes. (I got over it pretty quickly!) It was just very awkward and when I saw her I wanted nothing to do with her – so I guess that’s how you know a friendship is over. After that little run in happened, I decided that I wanted to take advantage of one of my dear friends’ offer to go out with him that night. I met up with one of my favorite ex-coworkers in the world, Nick. Him and I go way back from the time I was sixteen and first starting at PacSun and we’ve been friends ever since. Even though I was really tired I made it out to a bar in Akron that his roommate works at and we had a terrific time! This was our first time going out together where I could drink legally so it was an exciting milestone in our friendship! After a drink or two and a lot of laughing about morbid, vulgar, and completely off putting subjects I called it a night and went home. Being able to hang out with my sweet Nick made going out even though I was exhausted completely worth it!

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^^^ #babes

I’ve had such a blast rekindling relationships with people who I haven’t seen in forever. By losing one friend I gained a lot more and I couldn’t be happier. I’ve had a lot of really great people fill my time this summer and I wouldn’t change one thing! So here’s to the Old Faithfuls – my tried and true friends who have been there for me in the long run. I love and appreciate all of you so much! ❤

I hope that all of you had a good weekend and a wonderful start to your week! What was everyone up to these past few days? Anything exciting? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

Drunk Girl Diaries

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Drunk Girl Diaries

Heyyy everyone and happy Saturday! So last night I was the epitome of white girl wasted which resulted in some classic drunk girl behavior that was too funny not to share! My friend came over last night for what I thought was going to be some casual drinks on the deck but unfortunately, Lil Red went wayyy too hard. We were sipping on some super delicious mixed drinks that didn’t taste alcoholic in the slightest so I was throwing them back like no other. By the time our festivities were over (AKA when our bottle was done), I was throwing up in the bushes in my backyard. Strike one.

I headed back into my house, which I honestly don’t even remember doing and decided to shove some carbs in my face with the hopes that I would feel better. I grabbed a piece of white bread, a bag full of BBQ chips that were miraculously left on the kitchen table, and a cold enchilada leftover from dinner that I didn’t bother heating up. Within two bites of my fresh from the refrigerator enchilada I had to hurl AGAIN. So I made my way to the bathroom and spent at least ten minutes getting acquainted with the toilet. Strike two. I returned to my food only to run into my hard wooden chair which completely fell over and I went down with it. TIMBERRRRRR. I vividly remember my sloppy self saying “Jesus Christ, Sarah” and then I ate my bread and chips like a champ. I was able to keep the food down, so I guess I figured that it would be a good idea to eat eight coconut fudge cookies in a row and go to bed. Big, BIG mistake.

I’m not sure why I thought that it was necessary to eat so many cookies but I just couldn’t help it – they tasted SO good!! So I take my trashy ass self upstairs with a belly full of cookies, bread, and booze. By the time I got myself undressed (which I’m sure went over like a bullet in the skull), I was feeling very woozy but I thought that it would be in my best interest to just get into bed. Big mistake. Within thirty seconds of laying down, the urge to purge was there in full force so I booked it to the bathroom as fast as my wobbly little legs could take me. I spent lots of quality time with the toilet – apparently vodka and coconut cookies don’t mix well together. Strikes three, four, and five.

After I was done vomiting up a storm, I ended up falling asleep on the bathroom floor. I slept like someone who hasn’t seen their bed in a week…and in this case my bed was the hard, tiled floor of the throne room. Lucky for me, I dressed myself like I was getting ready for a trek in the snow when I got into my pajamas so at least I was warm. Drunky Sarah thought that a thick sleep shirt, sweatpants, and a hoodie were an absolute must and I guess it was, considering all of the material provided me with some cushioning! I woke up in the bathroom this morning from my sister walking in to get ready for work. She said, “Sarah, what are you doing in here?” To which I mumbled back, “I don’t know, I guess I fell asleep” and stumbled off to my bed to sleep some more.

Here’s the breakdown of my wastey pants night by numbers:

  • At least 9 shots of vodka
  • 1 glass of wine
  • 8 coconut fudge cookies
  • 5 instances of puking my brains out
  • 1 floral print pair of sweatpants matched with 1 striped hoodie (A perfect combo, obvs.)
  • 2 broken nails (Don’t ask me how, I couldn’t tell ya.)
  • 7 hours of sleep
  • 1 bathroom floor

Honestly, the entire night was simply hilarious to me and even my parents had a good laugh about it – which was shocking. I’m just so thankful that I was white girl wasted in the comfort and safety of my own home. Usually I’m not one to discuss my drunken escapades in such vivid detail on here…But when you wake up on your bathroom floor, something needs to be said! Welcome to the world of a freshly turned twenty-one year old. (My mom said today, “Sarah, I think you’re like a little kid with a new toy with your drinking legality.” I couldn’t have said it better myself.)

I hope that all of you are having a great day so far! What’s everyone up to for the remainder of the weekend? Any fun plans? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

Monday Update: Fourth Of July Edition

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Monday Update: Fourth Of July Edition

Helloooo everyone and happy Monday!!! I had lots of fun celebrating the Fourth Of July this weekend and I hope all of you had a great time doing whatever it is that you did! My sister Kristen and I met up with our friends in Akron at Locke 3 to get our drink on and watch the fireworks. We walked around all of the different food trucks and activities and began our evening of drinking compliments of all of the beer stands! Once we assembled everyone who was invited we headed over to the bar and restaurant the Lockeview to sit on their rooftop patio, drink some more, and wait for the fireworks to start.

^^^ I had to!

The rooftop patio at the Lockeview was so perfect and all of the drinks that they had to offer were delicious and very moderately priced. While walking around the outdoor area everyone in the group was drinking beer and I decided to stick with that at the Lockeview. I had this super incredible raspberry beer that didn’t even taste like beer – we all agreed it tasted like drinking pop. After hanging around the patio for an hour or so it got dark enough outside for the fireworks to start. We had the best view of anyone who came to the event from the rooftop! The fireworks were awesome and they lasted for about fifteen minutes, which was a lot longer than I expected. I never really understood the fuss of celebrating the Fourth Of July before I turned twenty-one – but I can definitely see why people get into it after having my first legal drinking age experience!

After the fireworks show, Kristen and I stuck around for another half hour or so and then decided to head home. We had quite a bit of a walk from the Lockeview back to the parking garage and by the time we fought through the crowd of celebrators and got back to our car we both had to pee so bad. We should have went to the bathroom before we left but the line at the Lockeview was pretty long and we figured that we would be fine…We were dead wrong. The drive home was miserable and we both felt like we were going to explode but that didn’t stop us from getting Taco Bell! The line at the drive thru was surprisingly really short so we were able to get our burritos in record time, arrive back at home, AND PEE! #AMERICA

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Kristen and I both had a blast getting our Fourth of July on. It was a much better time than what I was expecting so I was pleasantly surprised by how much I didn’t want to leave the festivities. We would have stayed much later but Kristen had to be at work early the following day – but that’s okay! There’s always next year! 😉 I hope that all of you had a wonderful weekend and a great start to your Monday! What is everyone up to this week? Any exciting plans? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

PS: HAPPY SHARK WEEK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!