Category Archives: Mental Health

“Why Can’t I Quit You?” – Mistakes You’re Making When You Try To Break Bad Habits

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“Why Can’t I Quit You?” – Mistakes You’re Making When You Try To Break Bad Habits

I feel like everyone has at least one or more bad habits. If you say you don’t you are probably a liar! From binging on three gallons of ice cream in bed to smoking a pack a day, we all do things that we are not necessarily proud of. But, if you are at a point in your life that you would like to quit some of these behaviors, here are some tips for you:

“Why Can’t I Quit You?” – Mistakes You’re Making When You Try To Break Bad Habits:

It’s somewhat comforting to know that we all have bad habits. None of us are perfect people, floating through life unencumbered by the things that might sway us from our perfect course. They are those little things we do that our friends might have once brought up, polite as can be, before telling us to knock it off! We know about them, yet we do them anyway.

It’s unlikely that you don’t know that some of these habits can be an issue. Most of us are acutely aware of our failings, even if we try to ignore them. We even go as far as to seek to justify them and explain that it’s okay that we do X because we don’t do Y. If we try to stop them, we come up against a roadblock.

With the time for New Year’s Resolutions creeping up on us at a frightening pace, try and do something differently this time. Rather than just stopping something because you know you need to, find out the obstacles in your way. That way, you can be prepared when the Facebook New Year’s posts clog up your newsfeed!

You’re Not Just Giving Up A Habit – You’re Gaining A New One: This sounds a little bit worrying, but it’s actually helpful so long as the substitute is a healthier one. Take the biggest, baddest habit of them all: smoking. When you stop smoking, you lose the time and energy you would have previously spent smoking. You now have a vacuum of time, and succeeding at quitting is going to be about finding a new habit to fill the gap. It’s the same for a simple thing like biting your nails. You do that when you’re stressed, right? So what are you going to do when you’re stressed now?

You have to find a habit to replace the one that you’re losing. For example, smokers may turn to vaping and nail biters buy stress balls. Places like Shoreditch Vape will give you a fresh start away from tobacco and can make it easier to ease into quitting. If you are buying a vape to help transition into quitting smoking, it is important to stick with that goal so you don’t end up going back to smoking again. Making sure that you use vape products that are actually enjoyable rather than a plain substitute for cigarettes can make a big difference. It is for this reason that choosing a brand that sets the standard for excellence in the world of vaping isn’t just a matter of taste and it can actually help to fight your addiction by helping you to forget the positive association you had with smoking and replace this instead with high quality vaping products.

One of the best ways to help cease your smoking habit is with nicotine free vapes. It will still provide you with the physical act of smoking sans the harmful additives. HealthVape’s Caffeine Vape could be an excellent alternative that comes in a variety of flavors with a formula blend of caffeine, Vitamin B12, and L-Theanine. If you are considering a nicotine free vape, read the customer reviews so you can choose the one that gave people the most success.

You Don’t Understand Physical Addiction: Few of us do something because we don’t like it; we have our habits as they meet our emotional needs. They make us feel better and when they do that, we get a rush of a chemical called dopamine into our brains. This chemical is linked with feelings of joy and happiness. So when we break our habits, the dopamine goes away. We don’t like that.

You may associate physical addiction with the likes of heroin and nicotine, but it applies to pretty much anything. Deny your brain its daily rush of dopamine and its not going to be happy about it. So when you’re struggling in the early phases, give yourself a break. You’ve got to retrain your brain chemistry.

You Don’t Give It Time: Most of us want to shed our bad habits and be done with them ASAP, but it doesn’t work like that. Research at University College London concluded it takes us 66 days to adopt a new habit – which is what you’re doing – as routine. So give yourself time and don’t try and rush it. Anything else and there’s a risk of expecting too much and suffering the subsequent disappointment when you fail.

Creating healthy habits and new routines can be very difficult if you are staying in the place where your addiction festers. If you are binge drinking a lot in your own home, for example, that can be a particularly tough habit to break. Should this be the case for you, you might want to consider a Drug & alcohol addiction treatment in Texas (Or anywhere you fancy!) to get a fresh start away from your usual stresses and triggers. A change in location is a simple idea but it really can be effective in creating good habits and coping skills.

I am the first to admit that I have bad habits. But the right knowledge, tools, and willingness to change can make breaking your bad habit a little more easy. What is one of your worst habits? Have you ever broken a bad habit before? I want to hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

Featured Image Photo Provided By: Flickr

I Still Get Jealous

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I Still Get Jealous

Heyy everyone and TGIF! Have any of you ever gone through your social media pages and have just felt insanely jealous of people? This happens to Lil Red on occasion and it really grinds my gears. It’s one of those things where you see everyone and their brother on your friends list being happier, better, prettier, etc than you and it can really get a gal down. So what brings on these feelings? What can you do to remedy them? Take a listen to an ironic choice in music and then let’s discuss:

^^^ I had to!

This past week I saw that a girl who I went to high school with was studying abroad in France and Italy and it made me SO insanely jealous. That’s one thing that I would love to do and that I have mentioned frequently on the ol’ blog and to basically anyone who will listen. A thing about me is that when I want things, I want them ASAP. So to see someone who is my age essentially living my dream kind of killed me. It can be hard to see people doing something that you want so desperately while you’re sitting in Akron, Ohio being miserable. -__-

As soon as I became green with envy over this, I began to evaluate my life and what I was doing wrong. I was turning the pages in my mind of everything that I could be doing and that just made me feel even worse. I then made a mental list of everything that I do and all of the responsibilities I have and it felt like a slap in the face. I was doing what felt like a lot but I still couldn’t have this one thing that I really want.

My mental list ended up looking something like this:

  • Attending school full time at Tri-C.
  • Coaching figure skating for the Special Olympics.
  • Transporting both of my siblings who can’t drive multiple times per week.
  • Working as a freelance writer for different companies, artists, and musicians.
  • Doing consultations for individuals who would like to start their own blog.
  • Working for two different media companies on my social media pages.
  • Working for the Ohio Board of Developmental Disabilities to make sure that everyone is receiving the best care possible.

With all of these things stacking up in my day, I barely have time to breathe but it still didn’t seem good enough. But then I started to think about how I work my ass off every day and am doing so much to improve the lives of others. I reminded myself that it will be my turn to travel soon enough and that it would be all the more sweeter when it finally does happen. Then the mental list began to shift and it looked more like this:

Mental list take two:

  • I work hard at school and have gotten all A’s since I began college last year.
  • I bring joy into the lives of my skaters and their families.
  • I help improve the quality of life for others.
  • I get both of my siblings to where they need to be when they need it.
  • My freelance work has been really taking off and I have the articles, followers, and media companies that I work through to prove it.

Yes, it does suck when you want something that you simply can’t have. It also sucks even more when you see someone with what you desire so much. However, all I can do is keep on going because I am making great strides on my own even if I don’t feel that way sometimes. It can be hard to remember that at times but when I do it definitely helps easy my jealousy!

In the words of Nick Jonas, “I Still Get Jealous”, but that won’t stop me from continuing to keep on trucking and working hard! What is something that makes you jealous? What do you do to help with those feelings? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

Weekend Off

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Weekend Off

Hiii everyone and happy weekend! I hope all of you are having a wonderful and relaxing time and are up to a lot of fun. Unfortunately, things in the world of Lil Red are not going so hot right now so I’ll be MIA for the weekend to be depressed and miserable. -__-

I do have one nice thing to look forward to today though! My Special Olympic figure skaters who I’ve been coaching are having a performance at a skating rink in my neck of the woods this morning. A sensory friendly winter fest will be happening and it should be a lot of fun! I can’t wait to have some proud mama moments when I see my skaters perform their routines that we’ve been working so hard on! So there’s that. 🙂

Asides from that, I’m just really not feeling my life right now. So, if you need me you know where to find me via comments, email, or Facebook. But fear not, I’ll be back with you for the Monday Update soon! Does anyone participate in any winter sports? Who has some big weekend plans? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

sweet

^^^ Thanks, Sweet Brown. ❤

Happy

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Happy

Hellooo everyone and happy Hump Day! So yesterday I had an interaction with my beloved father that made me very Happy. I was having a hell of an awful day and after a complaining vent session to my dear old dad he said one sentence that made me feel infinitely better. Let’s discuss:

On Tuesday I was a frazzled mess. I was stressed from an abundance of school work and a full day of acting as the taxi driver to both of my siblings who currently can’t drive. I was up at the butt crack of dawn to leave my boyfriend’s house and get home in time to take my brother to work and my day never slowed down once.

After I returned home from my brethren’s place of employment I had a few precious hours to cram in some homework before I had to pick him up. So back into the Little Red Love Machine I went to collect him. But did it end there? NO, of course not! As soon as I dropped my bro off, it was time to pick up my sister from work and then go on a wild goose chase of an errand with her. This excursion resulted in some highway driving during peak traffic time, bathroom breaks at a Dairy Queen, and turning my car around to pick up forgotten items. Lord have mercy on me.

By the time that I got home from my running around crazy driving day that should have been a sitting around crazy homework day I was exhausted and I needed to vent STAT. I went into the living room where my dad was sitting on his recliner chair that’s so old his butt is imprinted into it and plopped myself down on the ottoman beside it. Once I was comfortable I opened fire on my busy day of chauffeuring siblings every which way. By the end of my five or so minute rant I was out of breath and even more flustered and then my dad simply said, “you’re doing a good job, Sarah”.

My dad countered my monologue of irritation, frustration, and aggravation with a one sentence answer that made me feel SO much better. These past few weeks I’ve been feeling very unappreciated in the family and yesterday felt like the “tip of the iceberg” as far as that situation goes. My father told me exactly what I needed to hear at the perfect time and afterwards I felt like a whole new person. My day got brighter (even though it was already pitch black out) and my outlook on all of my stresses in life did a complete 180. It. Was. Awesome.

Everyone needs a reminder every now and then that they’re doing a-okay in this crazy world and thanks to my dad giving that to me, I feel reassured and so much more confident about my life and the choices that I’m making. It made me feel so insanely Happy. I hope all of you are having a wonderful day so far! How is everyone’s week going? Who’s watching American Horror Story tonight?! I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

Loser

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Loser

Whatsup everyone and happy Sunday! So yesterday night my darling friend, Tyler, and I were FaceTiming and we had a very enlightening conversation that I would like to share with you. Sit back, enjoy this ironic choice of music, and let’s discuss:

During my chat with Tyler we both were expressing to each other how happy we our with our lives for the most part. This cued us to reminisce on high school and just how much it fucking sucked for the both of us. Saying that we had it rough during the supposed “best years of our lives” is a severe understatement. I had to laugh at one point with him, because this weekend I was interviewing a lovely girl for a new piece on lifewithlilred and she said something along the lines of how she always wanted to be my friend in high school because she thought I was really cool. When I told Tyler this, I followed it with “I don’t understand why, I was the biggest burnout, depressed loser ever in high school”.

After we chortled at my pathetic expense (lol), Tyler told me something that I thought was very profound. “Maybe it’s not such a bad thing being a loser in high school. I mean yeah, it sucked, but I feel like we both appreciate things so much more now”. I seriously couldn’t agree more. Tyler and I are both insanely pleased with where we’re at right now, which made how all of the “cool kids” from high school are doing now worth mentioning. It definitely seems like the tables have turned in a way, with the losers running the world and the cool kids stuck in their still in high school mentality. I’m not gonna lie, this is very gratifying!

The moral of the story? If you are or were a “loser” in high school – don’t fret, because your time to blossom is legitimately right around the corner. All you have to do is wait just a little bit longer and you’re going to be on cloud nine in no time. Now I get that saying to play the waiting game is easier said than done. No one knows how bad high school can suck more than me. But I promise you this, a happier life as a twenty-something is worth the wait. So for the time being: keep your chin up, grin and bear it, and know that two of the biggest losers that the high school world has ever seen are doing just fine now.

^^^ It seemed appropriate. 😉

I hope all of you are having a fabulous weekend chock full of lots of fun stuff! Can anyone relate to this post? Where are the cool kids and losers that you were in high school with at now? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

Sarah’s Sanity Update: Volume 2

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Sarah’s Sanity Update: Volume 2

Helloooo everyone and happy Tuesday! I hope all of you are having a great start to your week. I’m doing okay, in case you were wondering. This past week or so I’ve been stuck in this horrible rut of falling just below average as far as how I’m feeling goes. This sub-par cycle that I’ve been in sucks ass…It’s honestly more annoying than anything. Let’s discuss. (Warning: This post contains references to self harm and eating disorders. If that makes you uncomfortable, feel free not to read!)

^^^ It seemed appropriate since we’re going with a Britney motif this post!

So yes, it’s been an annoying week. I’m quite shocked that I’m feeling so blah because when I went to my psychiatrist at the beginning of the month she doubled my dose of Effexor. Now I’m on a considerably high amount and I still don’t feel much of a difference. I suppose in the mornings when I first take my pill I feel pretty good but then by the time late afternoon rolls around I’m ready to throw in the towel for the day. What sucks about these random weeks of feeling shitty is that when I start feeling upset is when I start getting all of these persistent urges to cut or purge…Don’t worry, I haven’t – but it’s SO hard not to. It’s really fucking exhausting, actually. Can you imagine going through the day with thoughts of self harm constantly swarming around your mind like flies? Welcome to my world.

The frustration that comes with this is what bothers me the most because I rarely do succumb to my temptations but they’re always there in the back of my mind no matter what. It seriously feels like a damned if I do and damned if I don’t situation. I mean, I always feel a sense of guilt after the euphoria of a self harm incident but not doing it brings me these insufferable weeks in which self harm is all I think about. I’m so glad that I built up my willpower by going months on end without an incident because if not I would be royally fucked on weeks like this. I feel like my mind is going a million miles a minute and all the while I’m running around like a mad woman trying to keep myself occupied so I can keep my thoughts at bay…It’s no wonder why I’m exhausted.

I know that I should probably go to therapy to help me cope better with my urges but I have this stupid stubborn mindset that if I’m not indulging then I’m okay. My old psychiatrist used to get on me like no other to see a therapist and I always told her that I would, but then I would end up convincing myself that I was fine. I hate admitting that I need help more than anything. I feel like when I start showing signs of instability at home is when I start getting babied and monitored and I despise that. Now when I’m having a hard time I just try to do my best at covering it up. Because I’m such a hard-headed little brat I probably won’t be going to therapy anytime soon but I’m so thankful that I have my blog to express how I’m feeling. I always feel a lot better after a good writing session so thanks for letting me vent!

sanity

Well I must be getting back to the ol’ Tri-C grind so I will talk to you all later! Until then, is anyone experiencing something similar to what I’m going through right now? If so, what are some of the coping skills that you utilize? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

Single 4 Lyfe

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Single 4 Lyfe

Heyyy everyone and happy Thursday! So I had a kind of funny experience at a doctors appointment last week that really got me thinking. When the doctor asked my marital status “single for life” came out instead of just “single”. It was such a silly blunder that I got a major laugh out of it but it also got me wondering why fabulous Lil Red is forever alone. This somewhat depressing questioning of myself brought me into a little slump – but then I remembered a few things about myself which ended up reminding me that the best person for me is ME!

1) If anyone is a “One Woman Wolf Pack” then it’s definitely me. You guys might not believe it but I actually dislike a vast majority of people. Surprise! (That’s why I like hanging out with myself, which I fondly refer to as my “one person party”. Welcome to a day in the life, boi.)

2) I’ve never really had a legitimate “boyfriend” or “girlfriend” – just people who I hang around with for a bit until they fuck me over in some way shape or form…Or I get bored. I can’t think of one positive experience that I’ve had with anyone who I’ve casually dated. That’s sad. I also don’t really like being around people whose intentions I can’t read. (As well as people in general). See point one and three. Honestly, I don’t even know how to girlfriend. Like, what do you do? Do you shave the hair on your toes? Do you wear extra deodorant? To fuck if I know.

3) I love myself…Like a lot. Therefore, I don’t like putting myself into situations where I’m bound to get hurt (IE: Every relationship ever). I’m very protective of me! Good looking out, Sarah. Thanks, Sarah.

4) When I want a guy or a girl to acknowledge me I just call myself pretty and take a bubble bath. Works like a charm.

5) I’m not willing to share my Taco Bell with anyone. (I don’t share SHIT.)

titanic

This post was actually supposed to be serious originally but once I started writing I realized that I didn’t want to be one of those annoying twenty-somethings complaining about being single. Thus, a humorous look at Sarah’s Singlehood was born in “Single 4 Lyfe”. So what did this remembrance of some basic truths about Lil Red teach me? That I should probably just start dating myself. Welp…Here it goes…

  • Myself: “Sarah, will you go out with me?”
  • Myself: “Sure.”

SCORE!!!!!!!!!!

I hope that all of you are having an awesome day so far! I also hope that you got a good laugh out of this post! Shout out to all of my forever aloners out there – I’m right there with you! What was the shortest lived relationship that you ever had? What was one if your worst dating experiences? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

Sarah’s Sanity Update

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Sarah’s Sanity Update

Whatsup everyone and Happy Fourth Of July to those that celebrate! So this past week I finally met with a new psychiatrist after I had a disappointing falling out with my old pill pusher of seven years. Long story short, my final appointment with her resulted in me walking out and her never refilling my prescriptions. This ended up being a major shit show because I desperately needed my sleeping pills and antidepressants refilled because my prescription was almost gone. I only had about two days worth of medicine at the time and then I was donezo until I could get someone to fill my prescription. Multiple phone calls were made to my old psychiatrist’s office but she never followed through and at that point I was fresh out of my pills. I’ve been on a very high dose of Trazodone for years because I literally can’t sleep without it and I’ve been on Effexor for close to a year for depression and anxiety. And because my doctor was an asshole, I was without my medicine for almost an entire week….It was legitimately the worst time of my life.

I think people think that I’m exaggerating when I say that I can’t sleep without my pills – but I can’t sleep without my pills. In the five days that I was without my Trazodone I probably slept a total of twelve hours or less. It’s that bad. Some nights I was up all night, other nights I was lucky to catch two hours of sleep. It was just so hard because on top of being completely exhausted from little to no sleep, I was starting to feel the effects of medication withdrawal as well. I went from taking my pills every day for years to stopping them completely without weening myself off. This resulted in flu like symptoms and I was basically in zombie mode for five days. It was honestly pretty scary. I felt like a shell of myself. I was so weak and so fucking tired. I looked like a straight up junkie – my eyes looked hollowed out from the dark circles that appeared from lack of sleep and I had no appetite so I was barely eating which made me look very frail and paler than usual. I was a hot, hot mess. Thankfully on day six of no meds, the emergency psychiatrist on call at a local hospital looked through my files and felt comfortable refilling my prescriptions. She was seriously an angel and that first night of being able to sleep again was the most amazing thing in the entire world.

That paragraph doesn’t even begin to describe the physical turmoil and mental exhaustion that my sleepless nights resulted in thanks to my ex-psychiatrist. So when I met with my new one this week and told her about what happened she was extremely sympathetic and began asking me more questions about my sleeping habits. She then diagnosed me with insomnia which was never brought up with my old doctor. I’ve always known that my sleeping problems were more severe than just the occasional sleepless night. Sometimes I can’t sleep even when I do take my medicine, which is enough Trazodone to knock out a horse. It was very comforting to have my issue diagnosed with an actual name. I never really brought up the “I word” with my old psychiatrist because I figured that after seven years she would have diagnosed me by now. So being seen by someone with a fresh pair of eyes who was able to address the problem within fifteen minutes of meeting me felt awesome. This brings me immense relief because now I know that no matter what psychiatrist I end up at in the next few years I’ll never have to argue to keep my dose of sleeping pills high or have to explain myself about it.

I definitely feel a lot better after meeting with my new psychiatrist and feel very comforted in knowing that I have this new diagnosis in my file now. I really liked my new doctor and am looking forward to my next appointment with her! I hope that all of you are having a fabulous day so far! Are you celebrating the Fourth Of July? Are you up to anything fun this weekend? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

Lil Red Path Of Righteousness

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Lil Red Path Of Righteousness

Whatupp everyone and happy Thursday! I feel like I’ve discussed a lot of really fun subjects lately, but have any of them really described how I’m personally feeling? (Other than drunk…welcome to the blog of a freshly turned twenty-one year old!) The answer is NO, so I figured now would be a good time to tell you all about the direction my life is heading in that I so lovingly bestowed the title the Lil Red Path Of Righteousness upon. What is the #LRPOR you might ask? I’m so glad you did!

What it is: The LRPOR is the way that I choose to live my life…Or am trying to live my life, anyways. It’s all about accepting where I am at the moment and not comparing myself to others. I find that one of my biggest character flaws is constantly playing the compare and contrast game with people – friends, family, complete strangers…and that needs to stop ASAP. No one but me knows what’s right for me, so I need to start trusting my own judgement more because I’m actually a lot smarter than I give myself credit for. I’m honestly a lot more of everything than I give myself credit for – pretty, personable, witty, talented…But I’m such a modest person and sometimes my self esteem isn’t the best so I need to start showing myself a bit more love. Because the LRPOR is a lifestyle focus on self acceptance I’m hoping that my self esteem will get to a steady place. My fingers are also crossed that with this new habit of embracing myself that my urges to self harm or purge will diminish. I haven’t had any incidents of mutilation in a while, but unfortunately I still think about it a lot. The constant battle of willpower to not cut or vomit is exhausting so if the urges were to decrease even slightly, then that would be a victory in itself. So not only is the Lil Red Path Of Righteousness a way to get me to appreciate myself but it’s also a safety plan to keep my urges at bay. It’s a win, win, win, win situation!

^^^ Current blogging soundtrack!

lilred

^^^ #lilred #beentrill

So is success from following on the Lil Red Path Of Righteousness going to happen over night? No. But I’m glad I have a game plan for the time being! Now all I can do is continue to walk along the LRPOR (which I like to think of as a red bricked road) and keep on doing my best! I hope all of you are having a fabulous day so far! What’s a personal lifestyle choice that you follow? Do you have a name for it? I wanna hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

Monday Update: Mehhh Edition

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Monday Update: Mehhh Edition

Heyyy everyone and happy Memorial Day! (Warning: This post contains references to eating disorders – if that makes you uncomfortable feel free not to read!)

So I’ve been having an admittedly rough time with food lately. I’ve been restricting a lot and the worst part is, is that it doesn’t really bother me…which isn’t good at all. It’s so bad how it’s almost fun to me to see how long I can go without having a bite to eat. During the day I’ll drink at least one glass of a beverage with calories in it like lemonade or orange juice so I can get some sugar in me, but other than that I feel like I’ve put myself back on the “no meal a day” diet – along with a lot of cigarettes. I feel like this struggle would bother me a lot more if I wasn’t seeing visible physical changes every day that I go without food…more prominent collarbones, protruding hip bones – I straight up revel in the pleasure I get from looking in the mirror and seeing something other than fat. During my years of being bulimic, I always told myself that I could never dabble in anorexic behaviors because I didn’t have the will power to do it. But now that I have achieved going days in a row without eating it’s almost like I’ve gained a new skill which is weirdly exciting to me. I remember when the celebrity Meghan Trainer got a lot of backlash for saying that she wasn’t “strong enough” to be anorexic – and she’s right…it’s not a weak mans disorder, so the fact that I have the mental strength that some people just don’t have makes me feel good. Yesterday when I got home in the evening I told myself I would eat, but the thought of eating was disgusting to me and I lost my appetite. I’m one of those people who physically can’t eat if I’m not hungry – I just can’t do it, so when I got home and my appetite was completely gone, I saw no point in making myself eat. Anorexia was always an appealing disorder to me during my extreme cutting and bulimic stages because it was something that no one else would really notice. Losing weight is a good thing to most people, so the disorder could go unrecognized as opposed to the obvious slashed wrists or retching in the bathroom. You guys are probably reading this and thinking about how “crazy” I am and yada yada yada – and I know I’m not making the best choices for myself…But unfortunately, I find joy in these poor decisions which makes it even harder to stop. I know I keep saying that I should go to therapy, but it’s just so unappealing to me. I’m not interested in digging up my past for the millionth time with a different therapist out of the countless ones that I’ve seen before. It really is a cycle of complete misfortune, jumping from one method of self harm to the next – but I just haven’t the faintest idea on what to do when I feel like nothing but beating myself up makes me feel better. Ugh, sorry guys that was so heavy but I really needed to vent…I always find it easy to be super open with my thoughts, struggles, and the way I’m feeling – but it was especially easy typing this considering my iTunes has been playing the most emo music in my collection on shuffle for the past half hour. Lol, shameful.

-____________-

I hope all of you guys are having a fabulous Memorial Day! Do you have any exciting plans for the day? How was everyone’s weekend? I want to hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah