Tag Archives: helpful

Mar18

Are You Ready For A Big Change?

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Are You Ready For A Big Change?

Hello!! Whether it is a change that is expected or not, change can be really hard. However, change is necessary and, more often than not, the risk is worth the reward. I have some big changes coming up in the next few months and despite feeling a little stressed, I am mainly excited! After spending a lot of time mulling over my decision, I was able to reach a conclusion that was best for me. Here are the approaches that I took that I found to be the most helpful and maybe they will help you too for your next big adventure:

Time Travel:

Are you currently feeling unhappy with where you’re at? Then, I invite you to time travel! Go back and think about the last point in your life when you were feeling fully content. What was your situation back then? What changed between then and now? Can you make the changes to get those feel good feelings back? When you can pinpoint that moment in time, you can really start to evaluate what was working for and against you. Even if you can’t make a huge change immediately to get your life on a more positive trajectory, you will have a place to start when the time comes.

Plan A, B, & C:

Of course, making major life changes requires a lot of planning. In my situation, I made my perfect world plan as well as several backup options that I would be happy with too. When you have a Plan A, a backup plan, and a backup to your backup plan, you are well set to implement them anyway you see fit. It could be a combination of the three or you might find that one plan has everything and you are going for it. Putting all of your eggs in one basket definitely means betting on yourself but, remember, sometimes compromises will need to be made to get you to where you want to be!

When You Know, You Know:

Does simply the thought of making a change make you happy? Or maybe you have a gut feeling that a shift in your life needs to be made? Don’t ignore that! No one but you can tell you what’s right for you so listen to yourself. What’s best for you might not be the decision a partner or loved one would make and that’s okay because it’s your life. Only you can direct where it’s going to take you so if you are experiencing that desire for change, work with it.

Challenge Your Thoughts:

A big life change can sometimes feel like a grieving process. You are switching up the norm and that can be difficult to wrap your head around. However, implementing a necessary change is going to be a lot harder if you are constantly going back and forth about it in your head. Be firm and confident in the decision you arrived at and challenge those wishy washy thoughts. This is why it is so important to plan, plan, plan because solid next steps can allow you to go forth knowing without a doubt that you made the right choice.

If you feel ready for a big change – go for it full steam ahead. You never know where it will take you but the chances are high that you’re going to feel a lot better!

Have you had a big change in your life recently? What helped you during that process? I want to hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

Jun12

Feeling Overwhelmed? What Has Helped Me

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Feeling Overwhelmed? What Has Helped Me

Hello! Saying that my life has been overwhelming for the past almost year is the understatement of the century. I have a loved one in poor health and have essentially become a duel citizen between Akron and the Cleveland Clinic. On top of that, I work three jobs, try my best to maintain some semblance of a social life (occasionally!), pepper in self care when I can, and keep my apartment in check. It is a lot!

At times, the stress was really getting to me and I was feeling so low. It took a decent amount of time for me to find healthy ways to ease my mind even a little bit and that has been most helpful. If you are in a highly stressful point in your life, these are the things that have been working for me and they might help you too. Let’s get to it:

Have a good cry:

There has always been a misconception that crying is a sign of weakness. However, I think it is such a sign of strength. To be able to release your tension and blubber (lol) and sob until you have nothing left can be so healing. I have always found comfort in a good cry and feel it even more so right now. Yes, I still feel sad after a cry sesh, but I also feel an ease in the out of control, overwhelming emotions. I honestly cry several times per week and for my situation, it is a healthy and powerful release.

Talk it out:

One of the biggest mistakes that I have made throughout my entire life was bottling emotions and letting things fester. This is a massive no no! I thought that I knew the people who I could turn to in my life for assistance and a vent session, but they have proven to be less than helpful. So, I had to find a new support system (outside of Johnny and immediate family).

This came in the form of one of my aunts and an uncle. Although I had been estranged from them for a significant amount of time, they have become one of my greatest assets during this hardship. I talk to them each at least once per week and it feels so good to say everything I need to someone who is ready and willing to hear it. They have really rallied around me and I take a lot of comfort in knowing that they are always just a phone call away. (And, yes, I will be attending therapy sessions as soon as things slow down and already have counselors in mind!)

Ask for help:

Like I said, I thought I knew who would be helpful in my immediate family and that just wasn’t the case. So, I simply refused to ask for help period and found a sense of pride in everything that I was undertaking. I still feel proud of myself for what I have done and continue to do for my family, but I have also gotten a lot better at asking for what I need. I was feeling really alone and, as it happens, I unknowingly did have a support system where all I needed to do was ask when I needed assistance. This has helped ease my burden so much mentally and it sounds like such an obvious thing to say to ask for help. But, I think we all forget this sometimes and it’s good to have a reminder.

Leisure time:

Once I return home from my day, I am simply done with my phone unless it’s absolutely necessary to pick up a call or answer a text. This has helped SO much and squashed the feelings of being constantly “on call”. Now, during my leisure time with Johnny, I can enjoy it more fully and that has been great. We have so much fun playing video games together, watching our favorite shows, playing with the bunnies, and just sitting on our balcony and talking. I miss Johnny so much when I am away during the day and not having my phone as an extra appendage makes our leisure time even better.

Sleep well:

It can be hard to get good sleep when everything seems to be falling apart, but it is so important to at least try. Even when I know that I won’t get to sleep early due to racing thoughts, I try to let my body rest as much as I can and veg out. I have also become much more forgiving of myself when I need extra sleep. I have always suffered from night terrors, but they have become AWFUL with the stress that I am under. After a rough night, I allow myself to sleep in a bit and I never fault myself for it because I can get through the day better rested.

All of the things above seem like no brainers, but it’s helpful to be reminded. And, because they are no brainers, they will be easy for you to implement too! Best of luck. ❤

What helps you in an overwhelming situation? Who is in your support system? I want to hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

May18

Nothing To Write? Have Some Prompts!

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Nothing To Write? Have Some Prompts!

Hello! After publishing my Content Creating 101 post, I received lots of questions asking how I come up with daily content for lifewithlilred. There are a few answers that immediately come to mind, but the first and foremost is that I love to write. I always have and even though I hated school, I never minded when writing papers was the assignment. I like to consider writing as something that I am good at and it makes me feel good when I do it; So, I just go for it! Writing brings me joy so, in that regard, it is very easy for me to find inspiration for content because everything makes me want to write lol.

Although daily content is on lifewithlilred, that doesn’t mean that I don’t get writer’s block too. I swear, some mornings I sit here for twenty or so minutes struggling to get a post started. Writer’s block happens to the best of us, but it’s still annoying AF! If you weren’t aware, WordPress now offers daily writing prompts. However, if you are looking to knock out some posts of your own quickly, I thought I’d provide some of my own too. Let’s get started:

Summer Plans:

  1. What are your goals this summer? I actually just recently wrote about this!
  2. What was the best summer vacation you ever took?
  3. What is your dream summer vacation?
  4. Describe your perfect summer day.
  5. Summertime recipes or party tips? Bring it on!

All About You:

  1. What were you like when you were little? Favorite games, toys, foods?
  2. What did you want to be when you grew up?
  3. What are your favorite things? What brings you joy?
  4. What is your favorite thing about yourself?
  5. What is your go to thing on a lazy day? Comfort shows and comfort food, perhaps? Oh wait, no – that’s me lol.

Hobbies:

  1. What is a project you completed that you are proud of?
  2. What is your favorite medium of art to work with?
  3. How do you express your personality with your hobby? Shopping is my favorite hobby and I express mine through my clothes!
  4. How did you get interested in your hobby? Who taught you?
  5. Did your hobby come easily to you or did you struggle to get started?

Just For Funsies:

  1. What is something that always makes you laugh? For me, that’s easy! The movie Step Brothers, of course!
  2. What is your biggest pet peeve?
  3. What is an adorable thing that your children or pets do? I simply can’t stand it when Melvin and Penelope are snuggling!
  4. What is something new that you want to try?
  5. What happened on the best day you have ever had?

There are twenty ideas above to help get you started and kick writer’s blocks’ stupid butt! Make sure you tag me in the post if you use any of these prompts because I would love to read them. And, if this was helpful to you and you would like more prompt posts, let me know!

What do you love about writing? What is something that you struggle with when you are writing? I want to hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah

PS: Always remember, that anything that you want to write is important. If you think something is worthy to write about, then it is! ❤

May8

Ways To Help Someone During A Tough Time

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Ways To Help Someone During A Tough Time

Hello!! As you know, it has not been sunshine and rainbows in Lil Red’s world as of late. I have basically been a dual citizen between Akron and Cleveland while a loved one is a long term patient at the Cleveland Clinic. During this difficult time, I have been so thankful to everyone who has reached out to me in case I need anything. In this post, I thought I’d put together a few helpful and not so helpful things that you can do if you would like to offer assistance to someone you know who is going through a hardship too. I know firsthand the merits and annoyances of a few of the following so let’s discuss:

DO – Let the person know you are here:

Sometimes, the most comforting thing that you can do is to just let someone know you are here. You are available to chat on the phone. You can be there in a flash if needed. Help is available if you ask. This puts the ball into the recipients court and gives them the opportunity to take you up on your offer if they choose. Which leads me to my next point:

DON’T – Bombard the person:

One of the absolute best things that you can do is to not bombard your loved one during the hardship they are experiencing. Constantly asking for updates, if they need help, and checking in is coming from a good place, of course, but it can also be a lot. I would highly recommend keeping check ins to a minimum unless asked for it because lots of calls and messages can be extremely overwhelming.

DO – Be empowering:

As much as it is appreciated to receive offers of assistance, there are some approaches that work better than others. I, personally, don’t like when it is implied that I can’t do things like maintain my household, grocery shop, or cook. Be mindful of your phrasing and try to empower the person instead. Something like “you have been doing so much, would it be helpful if I did XYZ?” goes a much longer way than “have you even been able to do XYZ?”.

DON’T – Pressure the person:

I have talked with SO many people during my “residency” at the Cleveland Clinic and one thing that we have all agreed on is how sick we are of hearing “take time for you”. The running joke is that we all reply with “how?” lol. It almost just feels like one more thing that we have to do on top of everything else. It sounds weird, but it is somewhat pressuring when you are hearing it from everyone and their brother! Once again, phrasing is important. “Can I do XYZ for you so you can take a break?” gives you the chance to say yes or no instead of a question mark.

DO – Be understanding:

I have become the queen of sending texts a week after receiving one, ignoring phone calls, and simply not replying back period. This is not coming from a place of being mean – just tired! Of course, I don’t love doing this but what was helpful for me was letting people know that if anything important was happening, they would know too. Your texts and calls might go unanswered and that’s okay! Be understanding of it and try your best to not blow up anyone’s phone in the process. ❤

At the end of July, it will be a year since my hardships began and these are all just things I noticed for myself personally. What is in this post might not be the case for you, but I thought I would pass it along anyway in case anything is remotely helpful!

Are you good or bad at accepting help? What was something that was beneficial or annoying during a difficult time? I want to hear from all of you, so leave me a comment and let’s chat! Much love. -Sarah